Tacoma Falls: Blazing Hearts

Don't make a fuss

Maury

I'm not a stranger to hard work since I spent most of my life working hard on everything. I spent hours ensuring my bedroom was tidy and my clothes were folded and hung just right. If I played with a toy, I put it right back. I used silverware when Maureen and Daddy allowed me to eat. I perfected my manners, never raising my voice. I even studied real hard to earn perfect grades, never missing a day of school, even if I was sick.

The teachers paid me no mind, and neither did anyone else. I just kept my head down and focused on my classwork. When I graduated high school, another student got the valedictorian spot. I hid my crushing disappointment. I was so sure I had earned the spot.

When I asked what the final grade point was, the principal told me they chose another student and not to make a fuss. So, I didn't. I sat on the stage in the number two spot and waited to give my well-thought-out speech. The principal said we didn't have time for my speech. So, I forewent my lovely speech.

I collected my diploma without applause and returned to my seat. I checked the audience but didn't see Daddy or Maureen in attendance. I saw Granny and Papa instead. They gave me a loving smile with a thumbs up. I can't say that didn't hurt a little. So, I forced a smile and nodded. Don't make a fuss, Maury.

I left for college in the fall and stayed to myself. I attended classes and studied really hard. While my fellow classmates were partying or having fun, I focused on my studies. I needed to keep my grades up for my scholarships.

At college graduation, I accepted my degree and didn't make a fuss. With all my studying, I took the bar and passed it on the first try. But again, I didn't make a fuss, quietly returned home, and started work at the law office/bait shop. I helped people with legal issues or bait for fishing. I still didn't make a fuss.

"Maury," my therapist said, getting my attention.

"Hmm?" I snapped my gaze to the therapist.

"You've been deep in thought for the past twenty minutes. What were you thinking?"

"Don't make a fuss." My face became grim when I spoke those words.

"Explain."

I launched into what people told me throughout my life. People told me not to make a fuss when I tried to voice my hurt or frustration. I told the therapist about my childhood and school and how I learned not to make a fuss and smile.

"Maury, people expected your compliance instead of you fighting their decisions. Your stepmother played a huge role in it when she spread those terrible lies about you. She was jealous."

"Why? I was only a little boy."

"Because you were a hindrance to what she wanted. She wanted your daddy's sole attention. She wanted to take center stage with everyone. But that was her issue, not yours."

"Daddy said he regrets listening to Maureen."

"But you doubt your daddy."

I nodded in response.

"Parents are fallible. They make mistakes, thinking they're doing the right thing. It doesn't make a lick of sense, but it's the truth. You said your daddy was different from you when your stepmother wasn't around."

"Yes, ma'am."

"Did you ever consider your daddy was trying to keep the peace, hoping to provide you with a mother figure?"

"I wouldn't have cared if I had a mother figure at home. I had one with Granny. She was enough."

"That's why you didn't want to draw attention to yourself at her funeral. It's why you wanted people to focus on your granny."