Sami's P.O.V.
"Do you really have to go?" Calum asked putting on his puppy face. He pulled me closer by my waist and layed his head down on my shoulder.
"Calum you knew we'd have to go back to England sometime" I said sadly wrapping my arms around him.
He didn't answer, he started kissing my neck instead. He placed light kisses from my shoulder to my neck all the way up to my cheek.
"Cal" I tried to get him to stop even though I didn't want him too. I wanted to stay with him but that wasn't possible. He kissed all around my face before finally placing his lips on top of mine.
"I don't want you to go. I'll miss you too much." He looked at me with one of the saddest faces I have ever seen him make. It broke my heart. Calum wiped away the single tear that had rolled down my face.
"We'll be back to join you on the U.S. tour so don't worry it won't be too long!" I tried to cheer him and myself up. I always thought that people crying when they left their significant other was stupid but now I understand them.
"I know you will even if I have to pick you up myself." Calum laughed and it lifted a weight off my shoulders. His laugh is one of the most beautiful sound I have ever heard and it can light up my day instantly.
"Come here you idiot" I smiled at Calum before pulling him closer and crashing my lips onto his. This is the last time we'll get to have a proper make out session in a while so I'm gonna make the best of it.
.-.
The airport is one of the most depressing places. Sadly I didn't learn that through a romantic movie. I dreaded the day as soon as I woke up. We barely had any time before we drove to the airport. The boys insisted they come with us even when we told them not to.
We know that every normal person would want their boyfriend with them before they leave but not us. It just makes it harder to let go. When you have to let go and you know that if you stayed you could be with them it just makes you wanna not get on that plane. When they aren't at the airport you have no one there as a constant reminder of what you could have if you don't leave. When you love someone it's a weakness and a strength and you have to learn to control it.
Oh god did I just really think that. I don't love Calum. I mean we haven't been dating for that long. We also had that fight so I can't forget about that. Then again he almost got me pregnant and he's really sweet. He always knows how to cheer me up or what I'm in the mood for. He knows how to deal with my feelings on the good and bad days. Oh my god. I love Calum Hood. I love him.
I can't tell him that under any circumstances. Why did I have to have this realisation on the day that we're leaving for England. This will make things so much harder and honestly I can't deal with that. I can't deal with my feelings for Calum because the last time I felt this way towards someone was John and it took me a year to feel that way with him. I'm going way too fast with Calum and if I tell him I love him I'll scare him off for sure.
Why is this happening to me? Why can't I be a heartless human being who doesn't feel emotions such as love. Why do I have to fall for someone who will surely not return my feelings no matter how much I mean to him. Why does life always throw rocks in your path when you're just too tired to conker them.
"I'll miss you so much I can't even describe it" Calum took my hands in his and looked me directly in the eyes. This was the last time we would see each other in person for a while. I could see the tears building up in his eyes and I could feel the tears building up in mine.
I could see that he was trying to be strong but I didn't want him to be. He didn't have to be strong for me. He had proven that he was strong before now he has to prove that he has feelings.
