⚠️A/N: Warning, this chapter contains themes of sexual abuse, violence, and other heavy elements. If these make you uncomfortable, please move on to the next chapter.⚠️
"There are millions of people in Hell scattered throughout the seven rings and nine circles. Some are sinners, some are Hell-born, and some are unlucky souls who got screwed in the living world."
"These are their problems."
Luke: You're out picking stones with your pals the other day...
*THE OTHER DAY*
The trio were out in the fields of Wrath to help pickup some stones and boulders for some friends. Their girlfriends were nearby watching them work.
Vicious: Sunday's picking stones day.
Loona: A weird ass tale as old as time. Why are you doing this again?
Osric: We're getting paid.
Octavia: But, isn't that a bit boring.
Osric: Well, afterwards we get to go to the shooting range, and it's honestly satisfying shooting targets to help relieve stress.
Verosika: And lucky for us, we get to watch the men get a good workout in.
Luke: (suddenly appears from the grass) There's been an incident and I'd like to talk about it.
Osric: Get after it.
Luke: (looks at the ground)
Vicious: Well, Pitter-Patter, let's get at 'er.
Luke: (looks up at the sky)
Loona: Spit it out, big shoots.
Luke: (faces forward) I seen Angel's horn.
Girls: What?
Osric: You seen his impaler?
Vicious: His bobby dangler?
Luke: Well...
Osric: You seen his PhD?
Vicious: His WMD?
Luke: Now, look, fellas...
Osric: You seen his friendly weapon?
Vicious: His sticky grenade?
Verosika: You seen his ground squirrel?
Luke: Yeah, I've seen his ground squirrel.
Osric: You seen Angel's middle stump?
Vicious: You've seen his custard slinger?
Luke: Well, I'm coming up the stairs he's coming out of the bathroom naked as a jay bird for some fucking reason. I round the corner and, yeah, so I seen uh...
Osric: His holopoint.
Vicious: His hard drive.
Luke: Well, his floppy disk is what I seen, yeah.
Loona: Well, what's the evaluation?
Vicious: Yeah.
Verosika: I'd hear an assessment.
Octavia: Why is this the conversation?
Luke: (rests hands on hips) You wanna know what? Looked like a tall boy can of Red Bull hanging there.
This surprised them.
Loona: No.
Luke: Looked like a tube of tennis balls hanging there. A four pack.
YOU ARE READING
One Helluva Team (Hazbin Hotel + Helluva Boss OC Story)
FanfictionThere are millions of people in Hell scattered throughout the seven rings and nine circles. Some are sinners, some are Hell-born, and some are unlucky souls who got screwed in the living world. Luke Morningstar works at his family's hotel to rehabil...
