Quickies

12 - To the ones who lost their dreams

Heartbreak hurts the most.
But, have you ever asked someone how much it hurts when you have always dreamed of something have planned your entire future, and then have to give up on that dream forever?
And believe that perhaps God has made a better plan.

Let me tell you how much it hurts,

You feel destroyed from the inside.

The ambitions the dreams all your hopes are crushed maybe because you made a silly mistake or the situation wasn't right.

A single mistake, and all your dreams all your hopes were crushed.

Your life spun 180 degrees, you ended up somewhere you never imagined you would. It feels like living a nightmare.

You never had imagined your life without your pursuits it was all you knew, but now without them, you are clueless.

You are hurt, broken, destroyed mentally and physically.
You don't know how you will ever get healed.

Everyone says,
God had other plans
Then why did he let you love this, why did he make you go through this heartbreak?

No ambition,
Your eyes have lost their shine.
no more dreams...
Oh, I forgot. How will you dream?
You need to sleep before you can dream.
But your mind doesn't seem to sleep. It doesn't know how to shut off. It keeps thinking about replaying your dreams, your mistakes, again and again.
It doesn't know how to stop thinking about the dreams that you lost.

How to not think about the future which seems bleak.

Once, you had all your life planned,
But the next morning it's scattered.

All you do now is live just LIVE.

You don't have the energy left to dream anymore.

You are afraid to go through this again.

You are afraid to fail again.

Afraid to be clueless and helpless again.

You tried everything you could, just so you could achieve your dreams, to live the life you wanted. But in the process, you ended up ruining yourself.

And now when you don't have that dream you don't have the life you wanted, you are left with that ruined yourself.

You can't look at yourself,
you know you are to be blamed, you are to be blamed for harming yourself for something.

You desperately want to undo the harm but can't anymore.

Now it's your body's taking revenge to make you understand how wrong you were.

But this just adds pain, aches and guilt into your sorrow.

You are left shattered on the ground with no one to pick up, with no energy to ask for help and with no tears left.

Everyone knows the story of those who succeeded.
But what about those who didn't who might have worked harder than them?
What about those who ruined themselves in the process?
They should be talked about too so people know they aren't alone.

It's when we experience that we realise achievements, expectations, and dreams are good but the more important thing is you. No one realises this until they experience it. Until they suffer and understand How they devalued themselves,
How they didn't realise they and their health were more important.

And I hope no one has to experience it to learn it.

Dream....
Dream big...
But don't make your dream your life.
Your dream is to be part of your life, Your life isn't part of the dream.

What matters is you,
People are going to be there, But they won't experience your pain or your sorrow, they wouldn't be the ones in a mess they would be just standing there. Even your loved ones how much ever they want to help you won't be able to.

It's you who is going to face yourself, you are going to ask yourself when you look in the mirror was it so important, you are the one who is going to be in pain.

In the end, what matters is that smile on your face.
When everything ends that smile should remain.

You would achieve nothing even if you achieved your dreams if you couldn't smile. If you couldn't feel those emotions. If you couldn't feel the joy of achieving it.

You might always think about ifs.
But this life is your story and you will write an end to it. Write the one which would be satisfactory.

According to me,
I don't know if what God did was good or bad.
But I know one thing I will find a way again to make myself happy I will wait for myself. I might not make it as perfect as I had planned, But life is not meant to be perfect.

So instead I would prefer something that would make me happy.

Relationships might hurt, but getting your dreams crushed, hurts if not more than just as much.

It leaves you gasping for air and shattered on the ground.
A mess you wouldn't know how to collect.
A wound you wouldn't know how to tend.
A tear you wouldn't be able to stitch.

***

Dedicated to all those who once lost their dreams.