The Queen of Persia

Chapter Twelve

11 months later... 

I watch Mary's trembling fingers grasp the violet tulle sprawled down the length of her lithe figure. She tries to smile as one of her attendants begins to paint the lids of her eyes with a shimmering gold powder, but I can see behind the façade. She is nervous. It radiates from her like heat from the sun. I take three paces forward and grip both of her hands in mine. I can feel her rapid pulse throb through her delicate skin.

"Whatever happens," I whisper, "you will be alright."

She nods her head shakily.

An arm stretches in front of my face and I take a quick step backward. The attendant pays me no heed and begins stringing pearls through Mary's hair. Golden shoes are brought into the room and slipped onto her tiny feet. I smile brightly at her, hoping that I can be strong enough for the two of us. I know what she must be going through, because I am going through the same. I have the same thoughts and fears as I imagine everyone here does.

I worry about giving myself completely to a man who might discard me afterward like a finished meal. I think of the shame that would follow. I assume that these are the thoughts waging war in Mary's mind as well.

Sturdy fingers slip gilded bangles onto her arms and finish with a beautiful ruby on her finger. The women around her bow and slowly step away, admiring their masterpiece. She is now ready for her night with the king. I should be happy for her. She is my closest friend and I know that she craves my support, but that doesn't stop my stomach from curling inside of me when I take in her beauty.

What if he thinks her more beautiful than me?

What if he loves her?

I shove these thoughts away and move forward. Mary extends her embellished hands toward me. I wrap my fingers through hers as we bring our faces closer together. Our foreheads meet and for a moment we are silent. The room around us is now empty, but I know it will not last. Haggai will come to escort Mary to the king's chambers soon like I have seen him do each night since our year has been completed.

"I am scared, Hadassah," she whimpers.

I slip my fingers out of her grasp and slide my arms around her slender frame. She bends into me, resting her decorated head on my shoulder.

"You must be brave, Mary. Besides, the next time we meet you could be queen."

Her warm breath soaks through my sleeve as she releases an airy laugh. Our moment is interrupted when we both hear thick footsteps growing louder. Mary leans away from me as we focus our sights at the door. Haggai's broad frame swallows the space of my doorway. Silently he beckons to Mary and silently she picks up the sides of her gown and summons the courage I know she has within her.

***

When I awake in my bed the next day my mind immediately seeks after Mary. I scramble from underneath my covers and brace myself for the icy sting that awaits my bare feet as I place them on the floor. I walk quickly out of my room and let my eyes roam about the area of the harem. It is still. The beds are occupied with slumbering maidens. Silence fills the place.

I decide I need to be patient. Every time a candidate has spent a night with the king they have returned at first light. Mary will come to me soon. I only wait for a few moments more before the silence is broken up by footsteps. When I spot Mary, my eyes go wide. I see her bottom lip begin to quiver even from several paces away. She rushes past the columns that stand between us and collapse in my arms.

My fingers envelop themselves in her long, thick hair as muffled sobs are absorbed by my nightshift. I shush her gently as my imagination is provoked. Why is she in tears? What happened? I nudge her toward the privacy of my chambers, knowing that her outburst would draw attention to her. The last thing she would want when she is feeling this way is prying eyes.

I help her to the bed, my fingers running alongside the length of her chilly arm. She gasps loudly for breath as her fingers rub the skin beneath her eyes and nose.

"Mary? What happened?"

Her eyes shut tightly. Two tears spiral from her black eyelashes and stumble down her face until they drip completely off her chin.

"It was horrible! I was so nervous. It was so humiliating! I was trembling the entire time and I know he was put off by it too. I never want to see another man again! I just want to go home. I want to go home!"

My heart breaks. The hope I have been carrying inside of me all these months as I waited to see Xerxes again fades slightly. Mary is so distraught after her night with the king that any thought of going to him myself is petrifying. These thoughts consume my mind as I embrace my sobbing friend. Her tears flood my shift while I hold her to me firmly.

Curious eyes begin to travel our way. Whispers fill the harem as rumors and speculations begin. I moan as I think about the aftermath that awaits Mary. She does not deserve any more humiliation than she has already experienced. I place a soft kiss on the top of her head and tighten my grip around her.

Mary is not the new queen. This means that I will soon have to go before Xerxes myself. Does Mary's fate wait me? Will my spirit be broken like hers? I stifle a shudder that teases to travel through my skin. I have to be strong.