"That should hold you for now. You should be more careful, Severus. This is the third time I've seen you in here," Madam Pomfrey said before leaving Severus to his thoughts. He sat up, looking down at himself. Most scars had truly faded, except for a few—the Marauder-induced ones, the ones after Lily, and now the ones Remus gave him... both presently and the day of the accident. His usual robes were semi-ripped and dirty. He wasn't badly hurt, though his mind was suffering. He thought of Black, who was supposed to receive the Dementor's Kiss. This should make him feel... what exactly? Happy? Sad?
He never got along with Black, yet he was guilty of feeling some enjoyment at the thought of him dying. He wasn’t a good person... was he?
Severus slowly got up. He needed some fresh air, and the robes over him fell slightly as he moved. He made his way up to the Astronomy Tower. "It's been a while since I've been up here," he muttered, sitting down and looking at the blinding lights called stars that littered the sky. He searched his pocket and found the little notebook Lucius had once gifted him. Why had he kept it? A note fell out.
"Why won’t she love me? I’ve done everything..." or what he could tell—it was scribbled over and tear-stained. "Liar!" "Monster." "Freak." Words describing what he hated about himself and others, faintly smelling of must and alcohol... Firewhisky. "You're miserable. Die... die... die."
A photo fell out, of Lucius and himself. That’s all he could see—just a photo of everyone, but what had gotten better with Lucius? He seemed happy. But the Dark Lord questioned him—he had gotten sloppy, impulsive, emotional...
"You wanted to talk?" Lucius asked, waiting patiently for Severus.
"Yes, I did..." Severus slowly took a book and shoved it into Lucius's arms.
"What’s this?" Lucius flipped through the pages, seeing photos and letters they had exchanged—just a time capsule of their friendship and partnership, even the little bracelet he had given him. "I... I don’t get it. Why are you giving this back to me, Sev?"
Severus took a deep breath, taking Lucius's hand. "I would like..." He stuttered, on the verge of tears. "We're not meant for each other. This is goodbye..."
The book made a thud as Lucius dropped it, dread filling his once-confused, yet happy face. "W-what...?"
"I'm leading you on, Lucius. You deserve better. Not me." Severus turned to walk away, but Lucius stopped him.
"Who told you that? Was it Albus? Is he poisoning your mind, Severus?! Are you mad?" Lucius yelled, his nails digging into the brunette’s wrist.. "Let go.. please" Severus mumbled slightly pulling his hand away
"No, not until you tell me.. why? Do.. did I do something wrong? Are you in love with someone else..? Am I not enough?" He asked trying to see whag he did wrong.. desperately clinging to a small bir of hope taht this was a joke.. this was a joke?
" I do love you.. but we both know.. something big is coming.." he looked down at the death eater mark on his arm teeth gritting slightly.. "And it's more than we can take.."
"So you're just going to give up?"
"No. I'm doing this to protect you.. to protect me.. to protect us.. I'm sorry Lucius.. but it's over.."
Authors note-----
Hey yall, I know this is a bad way to leave one of the last chapters but I promise it'll get better, I'm planning to end this around Severus death. Mind you Sev still loves Lucius but he's trying to protect him and himself. Please don't get mad ✋️😭. I probably won't update this week. School is hectic and my back is acting up, once again thank you for all your support and stay safe out there
YOU ARE READING
My Little Viper~ {Snucius}
Fanfiction•This had been the worst year at hogwarts for Severus at least he's abusive father had not only been more extreme ever seems he got into Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizarding, but he had just ruined his friendship with Lilly and not mention it...
