"Woah woah woah ... Wait wait a minute. You're telling me you were next to me for almost 22 years. why? And how?" I asked
" I mean why me? Am I the only one you've been with? Or have you been around other people's lives before? And who are you? What are you and why can't I see your face? And why did it feel like you were trying to kill me at first but you're overly nice over a second? and why we're here? why aren't we in my room? and am I awake now or asleep? And how can I spend hours here with you but always wake up at the same time as when I see you first? I'm having a hard time comprehending all this". I added.
Suddenly, I found myself grappling with the inexplicable events that had just unfolded. Sweat drenched my skin, my heart raced, and confusion clouded my mind like a dense fog. The encounter with ATAR, or whatever he was, left me with more questions than answers.
With trembling hands, I reached for my glasses, the world around me still hazy with uncertainty. The room was silent, save for the rhythm of my own frantic breaths. But my thoughts, oh, they were a tempest, swirling with doubts and fears.
"Why?" I muttered to the empty room as if the walls themselves held the answers I sought. "Why me? Why now?"
But there were no answers forthcoming, only the echo of my own voice bouncing off the walls like a mocking specter. I knew I had to find him, to confront him, to demand the truth that eluded me.
My search proved futile, though. ATAR was nowhere to be found, leaving behind only the lingering scent of uncertainty and a trail of unanswered questions.
Desperation clawed at my chest like a beast hungry for prey. I needed answers and craved them like a drowning man who yearns for air. And so, with a heavy heart and a mind filled with turmoil, I closed my eyes and let my thoughts drift into the void.
It was there, in that dark emptiness behind my closed lids, that I found myself once more standing amidst the ruins of my old house. The turtles, the toys the pictures, and the furniture are no longer there as if it was abandoned ages ago. The familiar sights and sounds of my childhood home no longer surrounded me, but there was something different, something unsettling lurking in the cornfield. And then I saw him, ATAR, standing on the edge of the cornfield like a sentinel guarding some long-forgotten secret.
Driven by the curiousness that I have and how mad I am at him craving answers to my questions, I took my first steps toward him and all I could feel was how heavy my body was moving. It is as if I suddenly weighed ten times my weight and as I'd time was moving slower. With each step, I feel an entity trying to stop and prevent me from reaching the edge.
Not even halfway to the edge where ATAR and I sat, my body was exhausted and I felt like my organs were dying ..... Then. Boom! I am back to my room with sweat all over my body and both my ears and nose are running blood.
" What is going on ?" I shouted
" Where is this blood coming from?" I continued this time with a silent voice trying not to wake my sleeping parents.
I grabbed the closest sheet I could find in my closet to clean the blood and quickly sprinted to the bathroom's mirror to see if I had any scars somewhere else.
*Cleaning my face in front of the mirror...
As soon as I lift my head to see whether there's is moor blood or not I glimpse the shadow of ATAR staring at me. The second I blink, I'm taken back to the cornfield and ATAR is waiting for me on the edge.
" Come here, Malik." His voice echoed in the silence of the cornfield.
" Does it look like I am not trying?" I said silently to myself.
" You're not trying hard enough Malik." He answered
" What? How did he hear this? Did I say it out loud?" I asked myself.
" Not a single thought goes by your head that I can't hear Malik. Now come here ." He answered.
With every bit of strength I had. I tried to pull myself to the edge and every step was harder than the one before.
"I could really use some help here ATAR. Aren't you supposed to be my guardian angel? Why are you holding me back ?." I shouted angrily
" I am not the one holding you back Malik." He replied
" That was it ?" I exclaimed
" It is everything you have been through Malik, things you haven't let go of yet." He replied
" What things?" I asked.
" ATAR, you enigmatic specter! What games do you play with me? What things, ATAR,? Answer me you fool" I added furiously.
YOU ARE READING
DOLOR
FantasyAfter a long day at school, Malik, a 22-year-old boy heads to his dark messy room to get some much-needed rest that night. A night that he will never forget.
