Collection of Povs

failure

Silently she taps her fingers up and down on her desk. Her nails scratch the wood slightly and she pulls away, trying to hold still and just rest her hand on top of the desk.

In utter silence she stares at the books around her.

Just a bunch of
Bullshit.

She thinks and bites her lower lip not even noticing the blood that slowly drips out of her lip.
Luisa takes a deep breath and picks up the pencil again.

Or at least tries to do so. Everything felt so blurry and the pen felt like it was way too heavy to be held.

She swallows hard and drops it again,just going back to staring at the papers.

Who was she if she failed this?

Easy.

No one.

She squeezes her eyes shut trying to blend out that agitating headache that's been pulsing through her head since what..hours?

How long had she even been sitting here? It felt like forever. And yet she barely managed to do anything at all.

It felt as if her brain was empty. All the knowledge just gone. All the effort put into learning just disappeared in the fog that took over her whole body.

She buries her face in her hands and very slowly she feels her hands getting wet as the tears begin rolling over her face.

She sniffles and stares ahead.

Why was she even trying?

What was even telling her that they'd be happy once she succeeded? Maybe all she would get would be a small squeeze on the shoulder and the so known saying:

"I didn't expect anything else from you"

Yeah. Probably that would be all she'd get. All she'd deserve. Because after all she was born for this. This was what she was sentenced to do. No.

Born to do.

This and nothing else. Nothing else in the world. So this was just something everyone was already expecting. No one was asking themselves whether she would pass or not. Because to them it was obvious that she would pass.

There was no other way it could turn out.

Luisa feels the air get stuck in her throat and the tears just keep rolling all over her face as a silent sob escapes her.

Maybe if there would have been a sibling. Maybe anyone. Anyone that could have eased this pain. This suffering.

Just anyone.