Demons of the Mind (Male reader X Rainbowsixseige)

The War of The Mind

I postpone death by living, by suffering, by error, by risking, by giving, by losing.

Anais Nin

Unknown Psychiatric hospital, Arizona

0900 Hours

The French man got up, turning to the door before I looked up at him "You read the file...no men in white masks on scene...my gun the only one fired...a whole platoon dead..." The man slowly nodded, looking at me again somberly "Y/N, you told me of your mind reverting to its little...Barbecue. Your brain was in autopilot. It was-" I cut him off tapping my foot in irritation "You don't believe that." I stated with a heavy sigh.

Sitting back down he shook his head "No...the Psychosis was very real. The army doctors don't believe that but I do. The only thing I agree with them on is that you where aware, just a sliver of you peered through your delusion, it was how you where left in a burning inferno of dead soldiers unharmed. It was...that sliver of you that fought...that won." He looked conflicted, his eyes studying me; my mannerisms and movements. "When was your last delusion?"

When he said that I locked eyes with the floor, "Not since they put me on the meds, but even so I am stuck here." Scratching my cheek I looked back up. "Well it's either here or some shit house of a federal prison...Insanity plea and all...no men in white masks found at the incident...my delusions...it wrote itself. Got the plea in the end." I felt my eyes sting and fill with tears, mom...dad...their son a war criminal...what a good way to ruin their lives... "So why are you here Doc. Just to patronize me some more? I've had shrinks before you don't help Hell the meds barley keep me together."

I could hear him scribbling down something on his clipboard, a soft sigh escaping his lips. "Y/N I am here to help. My boss thinks you will be a valued asset, he thinks you deserve a second chance." I shot up staring at him, "A second chance? I..." my voice quivered "I-I killed...innocent men, and women..." my tears began to flow down "I don't deserve a second chance..." The doctor nodded softly, somehow I finally felt understood. He actually seemed to listen. "Well...You don't need to take it. But we can at least get you out of here. If you stay on your meds and allow periodic checkups." I sat back down "So...I can get out of here?"

His big eyes rested deep in my soul "You can." I felt a peace in me well up. I was ready to accept; I was ready for freedom. "Ok...I'll do your check's and take my meds."

Management is doing things right; leadership is doing the right things.
-Peter Drucker

2 months later, Bingham Canyon Mine, Utah
0000 hours

I felt the sweat drip from my forehead as my body strained under the heat, I was crawling through a fissure in the depths of the mine, several had opened up in the past week; of course we weren't meant to be in them. But the foreman didn't care. He dropped his phone down this hole and I was the only one small enough to fit. "Y/N! Get down!" As soon as I heard the voice I ducked as a rock tumbled over my head, it was clear that I was not meant to be here. I saw the phone and reached for it; clutching it in my fist I started to crawl back up to relative the safety of the mine floor, it took me almost ten minutes to get back up. And it only took ten seconds for the foreman to grab his phone and dismiss us. "Fuck...you ok YN you look worn out..." I wiped my brow "I am ok...just, out of breath."

I heard a ringing in my ear as we got back to work, we had copper to move and work to do. Ever since I got out I'd done hard work, anything to keep my mind from shattering again; anything to keep me together and coherent...I had made friends. And Doc...or well his name was Gustavo, he kept in touch. It was nice to feel heard and understood. My life was no longer that moment in the sand, that moment of war. It was a full and just life. A dream come true if I was to be honest. At least it was until the men in the white masks came back...until they came to the mine...

The end for now...I hope you enjoy and I apologize for the wait.