Estavir's hand reached the top of the mountain and he pulled himself up. The top was flattened as if it had been cut off specifically to make room for the gate that stood before him in all its burning glowing golden majesty. The glow was so intense the wood of the gate was barely visible, but it was certainly there, hidden by light. He stood before it, basking a little too long in the astonishing warmth emanating from the glow.
The three spirits he met across his journey appeared before him, this time simultaneously, hovering near and above the gate; the last one he encountered floating above and the two others next to the gate in a triangle formation. In unison they spoke.
"You have done well on your trials, 'It' hopes you will learn from them and return a greater being. He will see you now."
The spirits shone bright and fused together into the gate which revealed a crystalline event horizon that radiated inwards.
Estavir was pulled towards the crystal and he felt his body move on its own until the cold touch of the crystal surrounded his entire body. The crystal engulfing his body gave a sharp cold sting, which completely blinded his senses. When his sensory overload was fading he noticed the white crystalline glow around him had dissolved to reveal a vast empty expanse, slowly permeated by low hanging and swaying mist, obscuring what he assumed was ground he felt beneath his feet.
When Estavir regained his bearings in the new environment he saw the three spirits once more, this time bright white, still in a triangle formation. They slowly moved away from each other equidistantly and as they grew further apart morphed into hand-like appendages. From inside the palms of these morphing hands light began to swell. This light grew small threads that met at the closest point between the three of them. The three hands then seemed to halt for just one moment before the hands closed, gripping the threads of light tightly and tugging harder, ripping reality apart where as they floated further apart. Out of the triangular shaped tear in the vast misty expanse something was being pulled into existence before Estavir's eyes. The fog and mist was pulled outwards as space seemed to spiral outward and away from the centre creating an emptiness which was slowly being filled by the emerging figure.
Estavir had trouble identifying the figure. Certainly it was easy to look at, it was a growing mass of white light extruding in a million directions, but he could not see it beyond a white silhouette.
Once the light had reached a critical mass and no longer got brighter, it absorbed the floating appendages into itself, closing the rip in space and was finally revealed to be a mass of uncountable human features. The centre of the mass began to move outwards revealing outlines of eyelids, which then slowly opened to reveal a massive eye peering absentmindedly ahead in the distance. It took notice and looked down at Estavir. As it did the mist surrounding Estavir pierced his entire body, draining him of his strength and forcing him into a kneeling position.
He tried to look up and directly at the figure but his body wouldn't budge out of its humbled position.
He then tried to speak but found no words were coming out of his mouth. While being perturbed by his inability to vocalise Estavir missed the giant figure letting out a shockwave that reverberated like a deep low groan which could be heard and felt from all directions simultaneously, echoing deep inside his head.
It resembled no language yet spoke to him directly, into his being. With a mixture of imagery and stinging emotions Estavir relived countless nightmares. Like opening a floodgate memories long forgotten, now returned to him; he felt like he was reliving every horrible action of his life over and over again with no ability to stop or control the flow of his mind. Estavir screamed in silence as the white figure continued to cause him pain through the throbbing echoing shockwaves it was concentrating on him. In his pain he continued to experiencing everything he had hoped to forget or undo or avoid across his entire life thousandfold.
Estavir began to feel tears rolling down his face as he heard and felt a voice shout inside him.
"LOOK AT ME!" the voice rang in echoes through his memories.
Estavir did manage to lift his head and look at the amalgamation of human features that stood before him. He looked it straight in the eye and suddenly started recognising what he was seeing. Every human feature within the conglomerate was a part of his memories, and not a single one was missing. Every anguish Estavir ever felt was embodied before him, now clear as day. The tears didn't stop but the mind cinema had.
Silence fell over the entire space as the figure before him etched forward using uncountably many arms, legs and faces to swim towards him.
When the figure was close enough to touch him a particular face grew more clearly amidst all the body parts; it was his own. It was calm and serene, its eyes were closed. The eyes of the face that bore his resemblance opened frantically revealing only the whites of bloodshot eyes, followed by the entire face breaking apart into a terrifyingly liquid flesh mouth that swallowed him whole.
Once swallowed he found himself in a different space again, pitch black this time, floating on what felt like a warm breeze. A voice echoed around him, it was the same voice as before.
"It is too early for you to receive that which you seek, your journey is not yet over." said the voice in a calm and well enunciated way.
"I have overcome your challenges," shouted Estavir into the space around him, "I have made it to the top, why wont you tell me what I need to know?"
For a moment there was a silence long enough to feel disappointing, followed by devious laughter that also kept going on long enough to be utterly demotivating.
"You speak so confidently of beating odds, yet here you stand still discontented.
"Who are you and what do you desire? How many lies have you told yourself?
"Who are we if not a reflection of you?"
Estavir did not respond.
"The illusion of illusion has been broken, wouldn't you agree?"
The warm breeze around Estavir subsided and he felt himself ejected from the miasma of human parts.
He looked around and found himself atop the mountain once more. He found himself on the ground on the other side of where the gate had originally stood, however, it was no longer there.
The three black shadow figures were floating in mid-air as they had been before he entered, turning their attention to Estavir as soon as he made noise while standing up.
"There is but one way to go," The three said in unison, "Follow the path and you'll meet journey's end."
They made no further efforts, slowly disappearing into nothingness, there was no laughter this time.
As they dissolved Estavir noticed a small hole forming where the final gate had been. He looked around the edges of the mountain top but could no longer see the path that led him up as the entire peak was now engulfed in a thick fog. With little confidence in his ability to make climbing down, he inspected the hole.
The hole that had appeared didn't seem special in any way, it was what he would have expected, round, deep, dark. It was certainly large enough for him to fit but he had his doubts about going down. It seemed to go straight down vertically with smooth walls on all sides and no end in sight. He tried shouting into it but heard no echo of his voice. He dropped a stone into the hole but it made no noise no matter how long he waited.
He decided he would risk it, he closed his eyes, took a deep breath and jumped down the hole.
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Mt. Sensan-Ghi
Short StoryFollow Estavir, an analogue for my psyche as he goes on a metaphorical journey, a climb up Mt.Sensan-Ghi. This book and its running narrative as well as other short stories were created as a way for me to work through my burnout. This is my first pu...