Hate to love you. K.T.H

Love Is Painful

Past.

"What is the difference between love and crush "???
She searched on Google and here is what she found:
-A crush is often based on physical attraction and tends to be a short-term feeling. Love tends to involve a deeper level of understanding and deep affection, usually developing over time.-

"Soooo if it stays for long it means it's love????
Okay I do have a crush on him , so let's enjoy, probably I'll get bored and move on from him soon, until that let's accept these feelings and cherish them" .

So she started to watch many of their videos, where she can see his pure and breathtaking boxy smile, his cute and funny chit chats with his friends, she didn't fell for his appearance on stage or his popularity as an idol, she literally found him attractive after watching their old videos, she fell for his pure and natural smile, she fell for his calm and deep voice, his beautiful eyes and his cute laugh with his dear members, she fell for his amazing personality, and the way they were with each other, laughing together, crying together, fighting each other then getting together as if nothing happened, she found him attractive after she read about his past and the way he struggles, she was emotionally connected to him and she didn't know what should she name her feelings, so instead of getting a annoyed by three feelings and hating him for it, she tried to accept her feelings for him, accept the fact that he is her bias, and that he is the reason of her happiness, so let's be happy for sometime.  "but still it's not love, cause it'll end in few days" that's what she thought.....
......................

"Love is not just happiness, it's not just sweet, it's painful, and full of sorrows, it's hard and difficult, not to mention if it's unrequited, it just breaks the person".....

That's what she realized in the past few months, when she thought that this attraction of her towards him will end soon, and that she'll be back to her normal life, but she was wrong.

Cause once she fell in love for him it was getting impossible for her to fell out of, it was getting harder for her to focus on her daily life, she wasn't happy with her own self, she feels hopeless whenever she see them,:

"what am I doing? I shouldn't be doing that in this age, I know there is no chance that I'll even be able to meet him, and here I am imagining all kinds of stuff, they are not even Muslims, will they ever be???? No idea".....

She started having Maladaptive Daydreaming
( a phycological problem which is so common in teenagers, and it has some other names which are more common and known among people like ( living in an imaginary world)
Anyway it's actually dangerous when it becomes obsession, you get addicted to it and would do it without you even realize, you'll imagin things that never happened in your life and it's more dangerous when your facial expressions or body guesters start to follow your mind and act as you are imagining....

( It's really common but mostly people don't know that it's a disease, they just do it for fun without realizing it's deep effect on their daily life, so if you guys have issues like that make sure to research on it and try to cure it.. best of luck (Author) )
.
A day when her friend asked her about the thing that scares her the most in her life she replied:
I am afraid if they died without being muslims
( _This is the actual reply I just gave to my sister yesterday_
-Author )
.................
Night came and the world became dark as well as her room, it was too dark that she can't even see her own hand, here she was all alone, she was the girl who was brave enough to stay in dark alone, can watch horror movies without her heartbeat getting fast, can go alone on the roof top at midnight and stay for hours, she has always been a brave girl but right now she was afraid, she was afraid of her self, she was afraid of life, she was scared enough to cry.......

Her pov:
"What will happen to me, No like why do I even like him? what was the sin I committed in which I got to know him as a punishment, Allah I am sorry I am really really sorry for loving him, I really feel guilty when I ask you to give him to me, I hate the fact that I love someone who is just Soo far from you, and what makes me guiltier that he is not just far himself but because of him even the young generation is getting distracted, Allah please I can't ask you to bring them any harms because even if I hate them, they are still special to me, but I can ask you to give them Hidayah, please show them the right path and make them follow it, so they will be really an idol for many, and many more, and they can really be a great example for those who still think bad about Islam. So Allah please honor Islam through them"......
She was strange, she first hates that she loves them than she forgets everything and start praying for them.
........................
BTS world
Year 2027

It was a big place filled with all kind of books, one of the biggest libraries in the world, in this bright place there was a man wearing white shirt and black jeans with black hoodie , white shoes and a black cap is on his head, hiding his handsome face behind a black mask and black glasses, he was trying to not to gain any attention without knowing that his hight and his cool but a bit strange dressing style was already gaining the attention, anyway he was happy that no one at least recognized him yet cause if they do it'll be a Chaos here and he won't be able to do what he came here for......
His bodyguards were all dressed in a casual look protecting him without anyone noticing, he was the most handsome man of the world and they were told to protect him at all costs.
He was Kim Taehyung , he just got back from military after serving for two years in the special forces, and he was just about to meet his hyungs who were back as well, he bought different kind of gifts for all of them but RM was left cause he wanted to gift him a book as RM loves reading but it was a problem to visit a public place ( library ) just for a book, anyway he happened to do that so he was there finding a great book that RM would loves, he didn't liked reading so he was just looking at the titles and title page, so that he can find something interesting,
"Here it is, this book really looks interesting, the title page is dark yet aesthetic and can actually gain attention, the name of the book is interesting too, and luckily it's in Korean language" he read the author's name but It was a name in another language so he couldn't even understand if it's a male or female, whatever he just found that book interesting so he just bought it with some other in Korean and English..........
He just came back, and now he was getting ready for the gathering which was being hold in his own house, they all enjoyed the gathering a lot, at last V gave them their gifts which they loved but yeah he didn't gifted that book 📖 cause he was planning to read it by himself......
.............................

To be continued........
Sorry guys I was late and also I couldn't write so much, and I really have no idea if what I am writing is fun for you or not, I am just going on but I still wish that you guys like the story and if you have any suggestions or ideas about my story so you can tell me, I'll appreciate your ideas......
And also can you guys tell me if I should keep Her as Y/n or should I name her cause I can't continue this way I have to name her....
Make sure to like vote comment and add my story, well please follow me as well.
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#kim Hadia