Info - mentions of smut, fluff, fear of commitment, some angst
The meeting was a whirlwind. I was so immediately taken with him. His hands were on me as the beat went through us.
I lied to myself minute after minute. I told myself I didn't do one night stands. I told myself I didn't know him well enough for this. However, with ever aching moment, more lust and want consumed me.
I wasn't even drunk as we fell into bed with with one another. He held my hands above my head as I writhed. The best sex I'd ever had.
I sparkled. I was radiant in that moment. I knew what Van Gogh felt, or any artist who had painted a sky. I was a star and he worshiped celestial beings.
His body moved against mine in a perfect rhythm. His parts moved with mine. We were dancing in a world of our own, to a song we had created ourselves.
It felt like so much more than a one night stand. It felt like this could be the beginning of forever and it scared me.
I has plans and a future that I'd never figured him into. I had it all mapped out in my head and he came along and tore it in half.
It was more than his body. It was the big things like his soul. It was the small things like how he offered me water after I screamed so loudly for him that my voice went out. It was how he played a song on piano for me. How he was shirtless and looked like a Greek god when he made me some late night popcorn. It was how no matter how many times I told him I could leave, he refused.
He seemed so happy in my presence. He was so ready to share numbers and information. He didn't want the night to end.
I was held close as I fell asleep. The skin to skin contact had been something I'd been missing. He felt nearer to my heart than a long term friend. I hadn't felt so full of warmth in years and it was bad.
When I woke up, I saw the way his deep breaths blew his messy curls. I saw the note he'd left asking me to give him my number if I got up first. I saw that he'd also asked me for a proper date.
I had to ignore it all. I couldn't figure him into my life right now. I wasn't ready to be swept off my feet like this. I didn't expect him to come and be like this. I didn't have plans for change. I couldn't believe I'd been so smitten so soon and it bothered me.
It was like the hunt for Cinderella. I saw him everywhere. Every video I came across that featured him he'd mention a girl who got away.
I had to wonder why he didn't use his contacts to find me. He must not want to push. He must not want to expose me. I knew my management would love if I shacked up with him and was a pretty play thing. I knew he wouldn't want to treat me that way though.
I began to regret it. I began to miss the things he did even though it had been one night. It had felt like our own universe in a bubble and I wanted it again. I told myself maybe there would be another time. I promised myself that if I got another chance, I'd take it.
So now he was here in front of me. He had nearly dropped his coffee and spilled it all over the floor. His heart pulled to mine like metal to magnet. He wore his feelings in his green eyes.
"Why?" He gasped as though I'd stolen all his breath. I knew what he meant immediately.
"I was scared," I admired. I nervously pushed some hair behind my ear. I was sure in that moment that he would scream at me for the turmoil and hurt. I remembered how sweet his note had been, how'd he'd begged to take me to breakfast.
"Are you still scared?" He whispered. I saw hope in his eyes. Some of the pain in my heart eased.
"Not anymore," I smiled.
He lifted me into his arms and kissed me deeply. A new beginning could be found.
