Doubts: Fairy Tail

Bad memories

Hey minna! So 5th chapter! Yay! Haha so I just want to dedicate this chapter to HoshiRyoko! HoshiRyoko has been inspiring me and keeping me moving forward with this story! I would like to thank you HoshiRyoko and everyone else who is reading this for inspiring me to continue and work on becoming a better writer! I am a fan of all of you amazing people! Love you guys!
::::: I tend to have trust issues and never truly open up to anyone. I write down things that I don't want people to know and put them in a box. Doing that helps me keep those things a secret. Thing is, I'm not sure if it's good for me to be doing that or bad. Cause technically I'm bottling up my feelings and sometimes that's considered not healthy! I guess I'll just do what feels right to me!:::::

-----------CHAPTER 5

I've lost track of how many days I've been stuck in this fantasy world. I just keep walking through the dark forest. I still haven't found any signs of the ogre. I just want to hurry up and get out of here. I cause to much trouble. Poor Natsu hasn't gotten a good night sleep in a really long time. I hear him wake up yelling every night from nightmares. All I want to do is be there right now to give him a big hug. But I can't do that until I get out of this place. Sometimes I still feel like I should just stay here and leave Fairy Tail alone. But I'm scared I would just cause more trouble then I'm worth. I want to beat this ogre and get out of this world then tell the guild members a proper goodbye so that I feel completed.

Another day goes by. Suddenly I'm met with a burst of bright light. I walk forwards towards the glow cautiously, it's a fire. I recognize the house that is burning. It's another memory. When I was younger my mother and I would always go to our vacation home in the mountains outside our village. This fire was from the night she died. A wizard had been paid to kill us so he set our house on fire. We never figured out who the wizard was paid by. I had been 7 when I saw my mom die right in front of me.

The house in front of me looked exactly the same as it did during that horrible day in August. The trees around the house have red and orange leaves now and are slightly charred from the heat. I see my mom upstairs in one of the flaming windows. She grabs a small figure next to her and pushes her out the window. It was me as a child. During that time I thought I was going to die. I was on the second story of the house when my mom threw me out the window. I saw my child self crawl away from the house, using mostly her arms. My legs had been hurt pretty bad during the fall. At the time I thought my mom was going to jump out after me. But she knew that there would only be time to safely get me out. I watched from a distance as my child figure turned around just in time to see my mothers face one more time before the house exploded. My mom knew that the house would explode because it used gas for heat and the fire had likely gotten the the gas tank in the basement. She had been right about that.

I sat there horrified at what I just saw for the second time. Tears streamed down my face. My father had blamed me for the incident because I was the reason we had went to the vacation home. I had wanted to visit again before I turned 8 and I asked my mom to bring me there when the leaves looked prettiest. It was after that incident that my father started beating me. I cried harder when I saw my moms twisted figure walk over to me.

"This was all your fault! We could have been happy! I would still be alive if you weren't so selfish!" She screamed at me before raising her arm and slapping me. I fell backwards from the force and started to cry, not because the slap hurt but because of the words she had said to me. "Mom..." I croaked. "I didn't mean too!" I yelled.

She stepped forward and punched me in the stomach. "You're weak. Do you not remember what I taught you?" She asked while glaring at me with a look that might kill. I'm not sure what she's talking about though. What did she teach me? Something about strength?