Burcu shifts from foot to foot, one of her hands fidgeting with the strap of her small handbag. She's just about to take her umpteenth - useless - deep breath to steady and steel herself when the door is finally opened. Kemal stands in front of her in bare feet, dove gray sweatpants that have no business looking this hot, and a washed-out, too-big, formerly-black t-shirt that looks buttery soft.
He starts upon seeing her, his brows rising at the same time that his jaw firms.
"What are you doing here?"
At least he doesn't sound like he'll throw her out of the building, although his sonorous voice lacks the warmth she's come to crave. No wonder, they didn't exactly part ways on good terms two days ago.
She tries a smile, hoping it doesn't look like a trembling, uncertain grimace instead.
"Well, here I am. Kapinda, evinde. I've come to talk."
A moment of loaded silence, dragging on. A small muscle is ticking in Kemal's clenched jaw.
"Don't you think the time for talking has come and gone?" His voice is calm, his eyes unreadable.
Burcu lifts her chin, holding his gaze. "Please. There's something really important we need to talk about. Please."
Shoulders slumping in defeat, Kemal motions her inside and closes the door behind her. His fingertips brush against her shoulders when he reaches out and helps her out of her light summer jacket, sending all her senses on alert.
Burcu is way too nervous to notice any details when she follows him into the living room. Unlike the last time when she was also preoccupied, this time it dimly registers that there's lots of space and light, modern furniture and huge black-and-white photographs on the walls. He seems to have cleaned up his mess - in the literal sense at least - since she barged in two days ago.
She perches on the edge of the couch he walks toward, waits for him sit down opposite her. He doesn't offer her anything to drink, as if he knows that she wouldn't be able to get a single gulp down anyway.
"Evet, dinliyorum."
This time when she takes a fortifying breath, she's assaulted by his scent and it sends her even more off kilter. As usual, her body wants to launch itself at him, wants to find out if they'd fit together like two puzzle pieces.
She grips her own hands, her knuckles turning white.
"I HAVE to ask you this, sorry. For the past two days, something you said has been going round and round in my head."
Silence, his face a mask like when he'd first started working at the school. It hasn't even been a year and yet it feels like a lifetime. So much has changed. And maybe yet more could change...
"What did you mean when you said I didn't even give you a second chance those days?"
Kemal rears back, as if he hadn't expected this question, as if it tore open old wounds. She can see him tense all over even though he remains slouched nonchalantly in his seat, legs spread.
"You should know that way better than I," he says at last, his tone angry and hurt in equal measure.
"I don't. That's why I'm asking."
His eyes narrowing, he tilts his head and studies her with such intensity that she feels stripped bare of all laughable defenses.
"Seriously?"
Indignity straightens her spine. "I've never once lied to you, Kemal. Not then, not now."
Is she imagining things or did he just flinch?
YOU ARE READING
I Knew I Loved You
Fanfiction'Sometimes "Goodbye" is a second chance.' (Shinedown) Ten years ago, Kemal was Burcu's first love when they met on campus. Now, they cross paths again when they happen to teach at the same school. Is a decade enough to overcome heartbreak and fall i...
