until it's gone I can never find peace {𝕹𝖞𝖝🌙}

chapter 10: DISBELIEF (insane)

I can't believe what happened yesterday. I woke up right next to him!? Am I even sane right now??? God?? I opened my eyes and I got to see him, the first thing I saw in the morning. We slept together? I looked at myself and hopefully I was in my own clothes.

Nothing happened between us, but I do remember we kissed. I recalled everything that happened yesterday. It was magical. My body held me back. Killing people seems easier than this??? I am confused. My body doesn't react when he is with me. My body forces me to do so and someday we would be fucking eachother like nothing.

He is still sleeping. My eyes met his lips. A perfection for sure. His parents must have done something great to get him in their life. His soft full lips seem kissable even after kissing for so long. I got closer to him as there was only a few inches difference between his and my lips. I stare at them and back to his eyes.

All I can say is magnificent. He's perfectly built. A strong muscular body, handsome face, a voice that makes my body weak and suddenly I noticed a tattoo on his collar bone. I don't see them often maybe because of the uniform. This is my first time seeing him half-naked like this.

It said "I can never find peace" I understand what he meant but why would he say that?Why would a happy man who doesn't care about any opinions that has made for him make this? I shrug it off as my eyes went back to his lips again. The audacity of my body to keep me going near and near is insane.

"You wanna see more?"

I startled when I realised that it was him talking. I move back as he opens his eyes. All I see is a deep ocean that I would love to drown in. Our eyes lock with each other even though I know this is not going to end well. I don't want him. But I want him.

I sat up straight as I was going to get up from the bed but he held my wrist back "stay with me" my heart beat was faster along with my cheeks burning. I don't know what to do in that situation, it's not something that I'm used to...but I love it.

"Are you insane?"

"Wasn't I yesterday?" His deep morning voice takes the life out of me. I can hear it forever. I don't say anything and ignore him as I get up.

"I gotta get ready for school"

"You sure? Today is Sunday"

I stop then and there as nothing comes out of my mind. I walk away straight and get inside my room as i slammed the door behind me. It feels weird, I want to hate it but I love it. This man had done something to me that no one could ever do. I hate him. I love him.

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Hey everyone, this is from the author. I need a mental break for a few days. A lot of things are not working as I wanted to...to my readers please wait patiently and look forward to it.

I apologize sincerely...

Love you all<33