Mixed Desires

1.

Avika's POV

"Don't you think it's time you get married?" My father's words echoed in the room, and a chill ran down my spine.

As soon as I heard the word 'married', my ears went numb. It was the one thing I had been dreading, the one thing I thought I could escape.

I sighed, trying to maintain my composure. "Why are you suddenly asking?" I questioned, my tone carefully neutral.

"Because you're getting older day by day. And I think you should marry soon,"

Am I??. And what's with that tone? He isn't that polite with me. Ever.

"I know, but I'm still young for this marriage stuff," I retorted.

"Do you even know when your mother married me, I was 24 and she was 20? and you still think 26 is too early?" He countered, a hint of frustration creeping into his voice.

"You don't understand, that time was different and mine is different, I want to travel the world and I still have a lot of things to discover and explore,"

"Vo toh tum shadi k baad bhi kar sakti ho," he responded dismissively.
(You can do that even after marriage)

"But.. I want to do that alone,"

"You can marry and then discover alone too, marriage doesn't mean you'll be trapped with your husband," he argued with his tone getting forceful with each word.

"But wh-" Before I could finish my sentence, I felt a sharp sting on my cheek. He had hit me.

The pain on my cheek stung, but not as much as the pain I felt every day by living in this house, subjected to taunts and slaps from my own father. My own biological father. But I didn't cry. I couldn't show him how much it hurt to be his daughter.

"No more arguments Avika. I thought I'd explain politely and you'd understand, but you're hell-bent on being adamant about unnecessary things. You're going to get married this month. The Rai family is coming to meet us tomorrow. Better be prepared," he declared, his voice filled with finality as he stormed out of the room.

He doesn't care. He never did. To him and my mother, I am just a disgrace upon the family.

First, they wanted a son. And when they didn't have one, they wanted me to carry on the business. But because I chose not to and pursued my own dreams, they labeled me as a disgrace. And that's why he's forcing me to marry into the Rai family, one of the most successful families around. Of course, he would do anything to expand his business and get rid of me.

After I pushed aside my thoughts, I realized with a sinking feeling that I had forgotten I was in the middle of recording my latest YouTube video. Panic surged through me as I remembered that everything I had just said had been captured on camera. Hastily, I stopped the recording and deleted it as quickly as I could. With a deep breath, I rose from my seat and began gathering my scattered belongings, placing each item back in its proper place.

Seeking a moment of solace, I made my way to the bathroom and stared at my reflection in the mirror. As I gazed into my own eyes, a flood of past traumas hit me like a gun.

***********

"Pl-please, le-leave me, papa..."

"I-i promise I w-will perform better ne-next time.. pa-papa, pleasee.."

"Pa-papa... he-he just ga-gave me back m-my pe-pencil.. I s-swear it's n-nothing.."

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