“Kenwood”
Weybridge, Surrey
February 12, 1965
3:00 a.m.
Cynthia*
Cynthia lay awake in bed and watched the shadows of the tree branches outside the window dance along the wall. She wanted to talk to him, ask him if the kiss was more than just a moment of weakness. Wasn’t this her second chance? She had thought of John every day for nearly two years, missing him, wondering if they had made a mistake, imagining what it would be like to share her life with him once more. She did love Andrew, but it wasn’t the same love she had for John. He was her first, the love of her life. They had been so young, gone though so much together. His kiss, the way he looked at her…made her think he could, just maybe, feel the same way. He was right across the hall. She couldn’t let him slip away again, not this time. She had to try. She had to be honest with him.
She took a deep breath, got out of bed and quietly tiptoed barefoot across the hall to John’s bedroom. Very gently, she knocked on his bedroom door. If he didn’t hear her, she would take it as a sign and turn around. If he did, she was going to stop being afraid - reminding herself that no one was married in this scenario and that she loved this man.
“Yeah?” He called out immediately.
“It’s me, ” she stammered. “It’s Cyn I mean.”
She heard him chuckling from the other side of the door, “Come in, me.”
“Are you decent?”
“Never.”
She smiled and stepped into the room cautiously. “I just em, I just needed to talk to you for a minute.”
The light on his nightstand was on and a book sat beside him. He was sitting up on top of the covers in a white tee shirt and pajama bottoms. “Are you alright?” She could tell he sensed her nervousness.
She walked over to his side of the bed and into the dim light. He was surprised to see her only in a nightgown and looked up to her.
“You held my hand….you kissed me.”
“Cyn…”
“No…don’t say anything. Not yet.” She slipped into bed and leaned over him, taking off his glasses and kissing his lips softly.
”What are you doing?” He was clearly taken aback by her boldness but didn’t push her away.
“Make love to me…” she whispered, kissing him again, harder this time and more passionately. Before he could protest she tossed his book off the bed and straddled his hips, beginning to slip the straps of her nightgown down and off her shoulders. “Like you used to…”
“Oh fuckin’ ‘ell Cyn…” Kissing her back he grabbed her bottom and flipped her so that she was now on her back.”Look at what you do to me woman…” He pulled her straps down completely and moved his kiss from her mouth to her neck. “I’ve thought about doing this to you in every room of this fuckin’ house.” He muttered into her neck, running his beautiful hands all over her body.
She closed her eyes and leaned her head back as he pulled her nightgown down to her waist, continuing his trail of kisses as he did so. “John…”
“Hmm?” He looked up to her with a wicked grin, slipping her nightgown off and mockingly tossing it to the corner where she had thrown his book.
She swallowed hard. “I still love you. I love you so much and I’m sorry if I didn’t tell you enough…”
“I love you too my little heathen…always have.” He moved back up to meet her lips and kissed her softly this time, brushing a few strands of blonde hair off her face.
