The Boy of Company B

[7] Lies Among Ranks

It'd been exactly five days without Charlie. We had to explain to the Lieutenant, and the rest of Company B, why we'd come back without Charlie. Instead of the truth, we informed Potter that we'd gotten ambushed by three Germans and Charlie died trying to save us. I just didn't have to heart to tell him that Charlie was a German, the whole company respected and loved him. We felt entirely lost. Apparently every one of us four had noticed his strange behavior, as we spoke of it many times.
"Guess it's just us now, laddies," Thomas said with a slight laugh.
"I wish it wasn't so," Will shook his head.
He said what all of us were thinking.
"How could he do that? Just befriend us and then betray us?" Lewis protested.
I hung my head low in shame.
Finn turned to me and began questioning what had happened that night.
"What did you see Lawrence?" He asked.
I took a deep breath, "I couldn't sleep so I went for a walk. I came across that field and settled down on a log. That's when I heard the whispering. I could clearly see the outline of a German M-15 helmet and I saw Charlie's face clear as day." I had explained.
A weary group of boys sat before me when I finished with my story. They shook their heads and cursed under their breath.
***
As the days went by we were able to get over the situation little by little. A few replacements were sent in. The boys and I took them under our wing. There were two of them: Jack Collins and Andrew Bergin. The boys were both 18. They were Irish and had been best friends since childhood. Jack had curly blonde hair and strong blue eyes. His skin was very fair, which caused his freckles to stick out a ton. Andrew was tall and thin. He had black hair and small brown eyes. The pair had an amazing sense of humor and they quickly became famous with the others in the company. Things had been pretty peaceful. We hadn't gone up top recently, and I wasn't sure when the next time we would was. We typically spent our time playing cards, sleeping, being on watch duty, drawing, or singing our good old war songs.
The constant sounds of battle started to get to me. Hell, who didn't it affect? This bloody war was hell for every one of us, didn't matter what side you were on. I saw men so desperate in an attempt to get out of there that they would put a bullet through their feet or hands. Some of them even stuck their hands over the trenches and had the Germans fire at them. It became clear to the higher men in charge that the wounds were self inflicted. Many poor men were stood against a firing squad for acting as 'cowards.' But the Generals and Colonels just didn't understand what we had seen and gone through. These men had endured countless months of horror. Some had watched their best friends die in the most brutal of ways. Others had gone mad from the lack of sleep and good food. We often starved, many starved to death. Disease was being spread rapidly among the men, killing many of them off within just a few days. It was nothing but brutal. We'd been lied to and deceived by the older men in charge. Frowned upon if we showed any sign of fear. We were supposed to be the heroes of our nations. Our blood has been poured onto the earth to only gain a few centimeters of land. We can never return home the same after all we've seen. The patriotic spirit we came in here with died after a while. Many felt hopeless. So hopeless, in fact, they took their own lives. We all knew the war wouldn't be over by Christmas, it was obvious that they lied to give us a sense of hope. We weren't going to march on Berlin. We couldn't even push the German line back more than two centimeters. Each replacement had been brainwashed by their superiors, just as we had. They still held onto that little bit of innocence, and I felt it was my responsibility to help them keep it. I knew I lost mine months ago and there was no way to recover it. The best I could do was to protect these young boys from harm, I wanted them to return home safely to their mothers. If I could do that, then I wouldn't wish for anything more.
****
It was almost Christmas, my favorite time of year. Who didn't love the holiday? We received packages from home. Many men saved them for Christmas Day while others tore them open the second the package was placed in their hands. My family sent me a package that I kept for Christmas Day. This was my very first Christmas away from home. For many it was their second or third. For others, it was their very last.
My younger brother, Sammy, would be turning 18 on the 21st. I hoped to God that he didn't join. He wrote to me often and told me how things were at home. Sam said that the streets were very quiet and empty.
"It feels eerie," he wrote.
My brother described the loneliness he felt since there was nobody to talk to or hang out with.
"I'll be home soon, buddy. Don't fret." I reassured him in a letter.
I wiped my nose with the half-frozen sleeve of my tunic. It was so cold out. My friends and I took to huddling together to stay warm. Hypothermia became extremely common in B Company. Everyday someone would get it. Whenever we woke up we were met with a frost covered No Mans Land. It was quite the sight to see dead men stay preserved for weeks because they were constantly covered with ice and snow. I tried my best to keep cheery until Christmas and Boxing Day. On Boxing Day there was this tradition where ranks switched with each other.
I thought about Charlie. I hoped that he had a good Christmas.