the heartbreak.

chapter four

Song, happiness, taylor swift.

Madelyn-

Why did I do that? Why did I make a damn deal with the devil? It's like playing with fire. I hated Russ. So, fucking much. So much hatred, yet I still make a deal with him. Why? I'm not quite sure of. It wasn't that bad of a deal, I go with him to an event. He writes fake letters to my daughter. I tell her dad is a good person, I'm lying. Hés a monster. I've fought him. I know him. Sometimes I wish I never met him, but then I wouldn't have autumn. Autumn my life. I couldn't live without her, which is why it sucks so fucking bad that I have to lie to her but, I know it's for the better. Because if I wasn't lying, we would both be dead.

Russ-

Shit. Fuck. Bitch. Ass. I struck a deal with the heiress herself. Fuck me. I don't know why I did it, I just did it. She needs me to write her daughter letters? Fine. I can do it. Kacy can help me sometimes. She always knows what to say, especially about love, and sappy shit. Sure, she was a child but, she was a smart one also. I step out of the elevator onto the ground floor. Something about Madelyn's smell or the way she looks at me shocks me to my core. She looks annoyed but fucking beautiful. She looks like she wants to rip my head off but also extravagant. No, fuck no. I'm not falling for her or her tricks. Sure, she might be attractive but shes a pain in my ass.

I grab a piece of paper and a pen. Okay. Just write a letter to kid. Pretending to be their dad from jail. Shit. I grab my phone from my pocket. My hands glide over the screen to Madelyns contact. My finger hits the call button. Murder me now. The phone rings, and rings, an- "Hello?" She answers. Bitch. "You know who it is you ass." She fake gasps. "Oh my gosh! I do! Its hugo-fucking-ego!" I Mutter something probably not very nice. "My egos fine darling. First, what the fuck do i put on a letter?" She sighs. "Well first your gonna want a pen and then a-" i swear... "I mean what to damn write." I groan. "Oh!" She chirps. "You shouldve just said that Hugo." I roll my eyes even though she cant see me. "Just, write it like to your daughter." She says calmly. "I dont have a kid." Dead silence. "Okay..." She starts. "I have a niece." I hear her smack her lips together. "I thought so! Anyways, act like your writing it to her. But your in jail for drug and abuse." I feel like shit that she had to go through that. I want to rip whatever his fucking name is head off for just looking at her. Not just her, hes probably done it to a lot of chicks. I dont like madeyn and i never will but, its fucking disgusting what some men to do woman. She snorts. "Im kissing Hugo. I'll text you." She hangs up and less then 5 mins later, she sends me a long paragraph. Time to write.

I text her.

Me: done.

Arch nemesis: good job pretty boy. Can you drop it off at my office tomorrow?

Me: sure.

Then, for the first time in a while, i fall asleep perfectly.

Madeyn-

Me and autumn were going out to dinner and i was gonna give her the note that Russ wrote me, tell her it was from her father and hopefully she wouldn't notice. How would she notice? Its just a note. She wont know. Right? I scribble on a note pad next to me. When the fuck is russ gonna be here? I told him to drop it off like 15 minutes ago. I groan quietly. I have a feeling tonight isnt gonna go well. I swallow hard. Its fine. Everything is going to go okay. The door clicks open and my eyes widen. Russ struts in here looking like he owns the place. His muscles flexing with every move and his hands, oh gosh his hands. I could just imagine the- No! Nope! I clear my throat. Never think that again. Its like he can read my damn mind cause he gives me a weird glare. "You alright there?" I grip my face. "Yeah im just... scared for tonight i guess. What if she finds out? She'll hate me forever." He snorts. "Shes your daughter she'll figure it the fuck out. We might be rivals or whatever but, i can tell your a great mom. Shes lucky to have you." What. Is russ going soft? Is this hard exterior just a coat of paint? "Aw, is russy going soft?" I pout. He gives me a sharping glare. "No. But i wont compliment you from now on." I roll my eyes. Whatever. "Okay shoo, shoo. I need peace and quiet." He slaps the note on my desk. "See you in two weeks darling." Darling? He called me that on the phone but before i could question it he hung up. Now he basically ran out of my office. I grab the letter. It looks... perfect. It says, to autumn from your dad, ryan. And then the note i told him to write. Perfection. Okay. I have to go. Autumns waiting for me at home and we are getting pasta. Her favorite.

Autumn sits in the back of the car and she starts blabbering about how she wants a dog so bad and she needs it. Im actually thinking about it. It would be kinda nice for her to have the company if im not home. She has the nanny and everything but, the nannys kind of a bitch. Ive been meaning to get her a new one. Just till shes a little bit older. We drive into the parking lot and i immediately recognize a particular veichle. Fuck you universe. Is he stalking me? Probably. No, he didnt know we were coming here, i hadnt told anyone. It was a surprise. Including for autumn. She jumps out of the car and squeals. "Can i get a lemonade and spaghetti?" Shes basically jumping up and down. I swallow. "Of course sweetheart."

We get seated and autumn immediately orders her lemonade. The waiter walks away and i grab the note from my pocket. I look around and my eyes meet his. His cold, green eyes dig deep into my soul. We make eye contact for a minute. Then, the bartender starts talking to russ. Fuck. That didn't happen. I whip my head back to autumn whos slowly sipping on her lemonade disturbed by no one. "So listen sweetheart, your dad sent you a note." Her eyes beam. The words feel sour and wrong. But i have to say them. "Here you go love." I hand her the note and luckily, my child is smart and knows how to read. I see her eyes skim over the note but... she frowns. Shit. "This isnt daddys handwriting..." Shit! What..? "Sweet-" She stands up. "No it isnt!" She yells causing a scene. Everyones eyes are on us. The only pair im focused on is my daughters. How does she knows what her own father's handwriting looks like? And why the fuck! And i mean the fuck did i lie to her? She stomps off. Russ's eyes remain on mine for a spilt second before i run outside to find her. "Autumn! Come bac-" A car speeds and hits her. Autumn. My daughter. She wails and i hear a crunch. No. No. No. no! No! No! No. No! I let out a scream and run to her side. Shes bleeding all over. No, no, shes not dead. I put my fingers on her pulse. Nothing. I put my fingers on her wrist. Nothing. The driver comes out crying, but i dont even see them. A sob tears through me. I collapse on the ground. Autumns dead. Gone. Forever. Ill never see her again. I killed her. She ran off because of me. I lied to her and killed her. I did it. Another sob wracks through me. I continue to wail uncontrollably. My limps feel numb. I killed my daughter. A strong embrace picks me up and i dont even know who it is. I want to die. I scream. And scream. And scream. I try and push them away. Their to strong. Why couldnt the car have hit me. Another sob hits me harder then the last. My. Daughter. Is. dead. Because of me. A seatbelt wraps around me and thats the last thing i remember before everything went dark.