Unforgettable Affection (boyxboy)

Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Seventeen

~~Lucas~~

I could hear soft voices. Everything was black. I feel someone's hand into mine. Sean. It was Sean's touch. Why can't I open my eyes? I tried and tried but couldn't. I heard beeps from the heart monitor. I forgot.... I took all those pills. Why was I so stupid? I tried to take my own life? I am better than that. I told myself the other day that I am a fighter and I will always keep fighting. Now I made myself sound like a hypocrite.

"Sean?" I heard Nathan's voice. Sean's hand slipped away from mine.

"Hey dad. Hey Rachel. Thank god you guys are finally here." Sean said nervously.

"Why was you holding his hand?" Nathan asked.

"To comfort him." Sean responded instantly.

"Thank you Sean." Nathan said.

"Thank you three for staying." Nathan and mom said. My mom grabbed my hand and kissed my forehead. Oh how I missed my mom so much! I pushed my eyes open.

"Mom?" I asked. Everyone rushed to my bed. Emily, Sean, Nathan, and Kaylie.

"Go get the doctor." Mom told Nathan. Nathan ran out of the room instantly.

"Why didn't you just call me when your father called?" Mom cried out. Tears fell from her eyes like a waterfall.

"I'm sorry." I started to cry. I could see how much I hurt them. Now they hate me..... I kinda hate myself too.

The doctor rushed in with a smile on his face.

"Glad to see you're awake." The doctor said. There was silence. "You are lucky to be alive. This guy right here shoved his fingers down your throat, making you throw up some pills. If he didn't.... You know what would happen." The doctor added. Tears filled my eyes once again. I feel so bad for doing this to them. I didn't even think about who I would be hurting. All I cared about was myself. I was so selfish to even see whom I would hurt. Thank you god for not taking me yet. Heaven has a plan for me and I know it's going to be a good one. I guess I wasn't ready to go just yet.

The doctor told me I should see a psychologist for my fear and hurt. I went through such a trauma. And that my brain was going out of whack. I guess he was right. They just don't want me to do what I did again. I never thought I would try something like that. I know that my mind was somewhere else at the time but still. I don't want to go living with the fact that I tried to take my own life. I am not like that. There is always another way then the last way. I just wanted the pain to go away. That's all I ever wanted.

The room emptied besides Sean and I.... The doctor said I can go home tonight. Everyone left to go home. I guess all of them was exhausted from staying with me. I tried to get Sean to leave also. But he would not even move. He is the most stubborn guy I have ever met.

"How you feeling?" Sean asked as I got up. "Like my insides just got pumped out." I grunted. It takes a whale on you. That's for sure. I took my gown off and tossed it on the bed. I slipped on my boxers and then slipped on my jeans. I turned around and Sean was grinning.

"What?" I raised an eyebrow.

"Did you know I was still standing here when you got naked?" Sean asked. Crap..... Where is my mind at right now?! I was speechless. I had no word to even explain how awkward I feel.

He walked closer to me, closing the distance between us. "You're beautiful." He pointed out. My face turned red. I could feel his breath inches from my face.

"I'm sorry." I said as my mind went back to the fact that how much I hurt Sean. He stepped back and handed me my shirt.

"It's ok." He said and turned around. I walked closer to him, grabbing his arm. I spun him around.

"No it's not Sean. I am truly sorry. I had no idea what I was thinking. I had no idea whom I would hurt. I hurt you the most. And I am sorry. I realized how much I am in love with you when I knew you stayed. You didn't even leave myside. You stayed Sean. You stayed when I was at my weakest. Words can't explain how much I am in love with you." I said. Wait.... Did I just say I loved him? I looked up at him and his face lit up like a Christmas tree.

"I am so in love with you." He said and crashed his lips into mine. There is so much pleasure and hunger in the kiss. But also passionate. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him closer. His fingers dug into my hips. Our bodies was smashed together. I bit his bottom lip as I pulled away. Our forehead rested on each other.

"Don't ever scare me like that again. I do not know what I would do if I lost you. You are everything to me Luke." Sean said. I blushed and gave him another kiss.

"Can we go home now?" I asked. He laughed and we walked out of the hospital. I am so glad that I have someone like Sean.