Unforgettable Affection (boyxboy)

Chapter Twenty Four

Chapter Twenty-Four

~~Sean~~

Lucas and I was not afraid at all to walk through the door, hand in hand soaking wet. Rachel and dad looked over at us from the living room. Rachel smiled and turned to look at dad. She nodded towards him. I heard him let out a grunt and got up, walking over to us. Dad looked me into the eyes and gave me the most unexpected thing. He hugged me tightly and let out a soft sob into my hair. I tried to stop myself from hugging him back but something told me to hug him back. I hugged him back tightly and tears filled my eyes. I cried into his chest. I never expected him to do this. He never hugged me before. Not since mom died of course.

He pulled away after about five minutes. He looked at Lucas and I both.

"If you two want to be together....... Then you can.... I don't like it but I have to agree that Sean is the happiest I seen him since his mother died. That takes a lot and if my son is happy then I am happy." Dad said. I couldn't help but smile and him and smile at Lucas.

"So does this mean I can kiss him anytime I want then?" Lucas asked. All of us started laughing.

"What have you done to my boy?" Rachel asked me. I chuckled.

"Love." I responded while looking at Lucas.

I sat in the office waiting to go into my shrink meeting. I swear, I don't even need a shrink. I just did a stupid decision. And I am happy to still be here today. I can't believe I tried to take my life. Yeah I was really upset and tired of having nightmares, but that doesn't mean that I need to choose the one way out.

"Lucas, you may come in." The shrink smiled at me. She flipped her curly brown hair to the side and held the door for me. I smiled and walked into her office.

"Take a seat on the love seat." She pointed over to the couch. I nodded and sat down. She sat down right in front of me and crossed her legs. She opened up my file and looked up at me.

"Do you want to start on telling me a little bit about yourself?" She asked.

"I rather you tell me about yourself first." I said nervously. She chuckled and nodded.

"Well, my name is Bianca Stevenson..... I am thirty four years of age, I have two kids. Anna, who is nine and Kendal who is twelve. I am married to my husband Holden. He is three years older than me and we have been together since high school. I graduated from Harvard for psychology and now I own my own practice." She informed. Well isn't she a smart cookie.

"Um..... My name is Lucas James Smith. I was born in North Carolina. I lived there all my life until recently. When my mom married my step dad. I fell in love with my step brother. So we are together now. And I am seventeen. Also a senior in high school." I informed. She stared at me for a few seconds and nodded.

"What about what happened to you a few years back?" She asked. Does shrinks know everything?!

"If you already know, then why are you asking me?" I asked.

"Because I want to hear your story."

"My story? Psh.... My story isn't worth hearing."

"I think your story is."

"Well that is what you think."

"That's ok. We can work up to you telling me your side of the story."

"It's not that I don't want to tell you..... It's just.... I don't trust you. I don't even know if you are going to tell anyone or not."

"Lucas, you have my word. Anything said in this room, stays in this room."

"There has to be a catch. There is always a catch."

"No catch. Just let it all out and tell me everything. It will make my way better to help you. To help you get over your nightmares and fears." She informed. I looked suspiciously at her for a few minutes. We sat in silence, examining each other. Maybe she can help me get over my nightmares. I want them to go away so bad.

"I was raped and beat by my father when I was thirteen years old..... My father was drunk when it happened. My mother left for a week for a business trip. I thought that my whole life was fucked up when my dad did this to me." I lifted up my shirt and showed her the scars on my body. I sat back down and continued.

"My father, hell I shouldn't even call him that.... He stabbed me, slashed me, and everything else possible. He did this over and over again until my mother came back home. I couldn't tell her or he would have killed me and possibly my mom. I didn't want that to happen. But I finally grew the balls and told her when she came home." I said while tears fell down my face. I looked up to see a box of tissues in front of me. I let out a soft smile and took the tissue.

"I can see that the scars are a constant reminder of him.... Am I right?" She asked and I nodded in agreement.

"What went through your mind when you try to overdose on your medication?"

"That it was the only way to stop the nightmares and the pain."

"Did it hurt when he called? Was you scared that it would make the nightmares worst?" She asked.

"I think you already know the answer to that."

"I just want to know how you felt."

"How I felt? I felt like that I couldn't stop the pain. I couldn't stop from the nightmares getting worst. I thought that they would go back like it was. Nightmares every night. I just wanted them to stop. When he called and I heard his voice....... I wanted to scream and go to kill him. But I thought that would make it worse than what I am already. I.... I don't know how I felt. Maybe I felt nothing. Maybe I felt everything. I just don't know." I shrugged.

"Does your boyfriend know this?"

"Yeah.... He is the one who saved me from my overdose."

"You love him don't you?" She asked and I nodded.

"Does he make you feel protected? Secure? That no one is going to hurt you?"

"Yes...." I said, knowing that she already knew the answer. She smiled and nodded.

"You should let him help you rise above. But you need to see what your actual fear and pain is. Next week we are going to do a session that will put you to sleep, but you will actually be awake. You will go back into the past and describe what is happening. The days that you were hurt and raped. Understood?" She asked. I nodded.

"Good, I will see you next week hun. Same time?" She asked.

"Yeah, that will be fine." I smiled and walked out of her office. When I walked out of the office building, Sean was leaning against his car. I smiled and ran to jump into his arms.