Idol | sunsun

3

Sunoo grew up surrounded by love. Love in its purest form, unconditional and fierce. He was raised in a house by the sea where the emotion dictated every word his parents dedicated to each other and leisurely, Sunoo's edges were erased by it, rounded until the only two feelings that reigned over his heart were love and fear.

His most vivid memories of fear happened during his teenage years. The first time he kissed a boy, when he couldn't tell if the butterflies in his stomach were a product of love, fear, or a mix of both. Could he love a boy he'd just met? Later, he'd realize that he couldn't. That he was meant to water the flower growing inside his ribcage for a long time before it could flourish.

Or the day he took the train to Seoul, when the cherry blossoms had just begun to bloom, ready to welcome Sunoo's university years— the most beautiful moment in life, according to the ancient sayings. Oh, he was terrified. He'd never left Busan without his parents, how was he supposed to survive alone? Seoul would eat him alive. Like a shark that smelled blood and became hungry, the big city would chase Sunoo like prey.

Despite it all, he survived Seoul. He found a new place to pour his heart into— once again, love made its way back into Sunoo's life, filling every corner of his shoe-box apartment. His new friends, Jungwon and Ni-ki, and Jake, with whom he'd reunited after spending two cold years away from each other. Around them, Sunoo felt like his ribcage had expanded, adapting itself to the demand for space.

And then he met Sunghoon.

Sunghoon, who shined so brightly that the sun would be embarrassed if she stood by his side. Sunghoon, who loved unapologetically and shamelessly, with the force of a thousand warriors. Sunghoon, who moved Sunoo's Earth and all of his stars and made him fall recklessly for him with just a smile.

Sunoo had never had to worry about love. It accompanied him naturally— planted itself in every aspect of his life and grew on its own. But with Sunghoon, an unstoppable force that seemed stronger than the most ancient of feelings, it wasn't so easy. Sunoo couldn't handle the impact after Sunghoon had crashed onto him— the moment Sunoo realized he loved him, he was met with the devastating realization that he didn't know how to do it.

That didn't mean he gave up, though. For an entire year, he worked alongside Sunghoon and his beautiful smiles and breathtaking kisses, and they learned how to mold the love they had for each other so it would fit in the little home that their hearts had created. They built the most beautiful bridge between their two souls, and it felt right . For quite some time, Sunoo thought he had every secret of the universe figured out.

He introduced Sunghoon to his family around that period of his life. It only made sense that the last of his worlds crashed together; Sunghoon had already met all of his friends, had seen every centimeter of his apartment, had read the words in the poems Sunoo hadn't shared with anyone but himself. The final step was meeting his parents.

Sunghoon wasn't as thrilled as he was. For the entirety of the ride down to Busan, he'd bitten his nails, gnawed at his lip, asked Sunoo a thousand questions and never listened to the answers.

"I just want them to like me," he said exasperatedly once they parked before their house. "What if they hate me, Sunoo?"

Sunoo turned off the engine and undid his belt. He shifted on his seat so that he could face Sunghoon, knocking their knees together. Touch, Sunghoon's love language. He cradled his face between his hands, holding him like water. "My love, look at me."

Sunghoon's eyelashes fluttered, fighting with themselves while he decided whether to look down or up. Eventually, his pretty eyes found Sunoo's, his lip between his teeth.