Orange Clouds | Kagehina

Fly

Warning!
Major triggering themes in this chapter. Take care and remember to stop if the topic becomes too unbearable.

A week had gone by since Hinata began smoking. He took one smoke after school almost every day and now he had only one left. It was the only thing he cared about at the moment and that was how to get more. He would not say he was addicted yet, but he was sure getting there. He contemplated whether to ask Teyo for help, but he was kinda nervous to ask. What would happen if Teyo just laughed and said no? All these thoughts filled his brain every day. Hinata never used to have social anxiety but here he was.

Ruined. Broken. Worthless

He forgot what his past life used to feel like. He forgot who he used to be and what drove him forward.

Every day, he would lie to his parents that he was hanging around with friends when, in reality, he was enjoying his smoke in peace. And he was planning to keep up with this lie. "Hey, have you finished task 5, Hinata?" The sudden question from Kaito came as a shock to Hinata. The boy had been trying here and there to talk with Hinata, but he always pushed away. For some reason, Hinata did not want anybody to see him.

Like, really see him. He wanted to be alone.

"Uhm..." Hinata fell silent when he gazed down at his test. The time was almost finished and he hadn't even begun writing.

"Hinata..." Kaito gave him a concerned expression as the teacher told the class that time had officially gone out. He shifted to stand right next to Hinata's desk. "You didn't study or?..." Kaito asked carefully like he was scared to say the wrong sentence.

"I guess not." Hinata felt the shame rise in his cheeks. He was definitely not known to be the academic of the class, but he could have done better. Way better.

"Hinata, I have to say something and I hope you don't take it bad." Kaito took a deep breath before he bent over Hinata's desk to look him in the eyes. "I'm very worried about you. These past two months you have been quiet and you have never done any of your homework. You don't look fine." Kaito's eyes narrowed somberly, "You haven't...I miss talking to you."

The words made Hinata swallow down. Kaito had been observing him and he knew all of this because Hinata used to be so vibrant and cheerful. He crumbled the paper in his hands and stood up from his chair in a hurried manner.

"W-Wait, Hinata I didn-"

"It's fine. You are right about me. I'll never be the same again." Hinata's eyes began flashing, tears praying to escape. "I just can't be the same after I lost...I lost everything."

Kaito stood there, baffled and motionless. Hinata knew that nobody could ever understand what he was going through. How it felt to hold his friends bodies while he was crying for them to wake up. How in one moment they were all smiling, excited to go and play beach volleyball because it was the last year of their senpais, and in another faithful moment they were all dead. The shattered pieces of glass all over the ground, the blood seeping and their lifeless eyes. Hinata could never forget.

Hinata left the classroom and he did not return for the next class. Instead, he found his bike and left the school premises altogether. He could not get the image out of his brain. It was haunting him forever and his heart was in great pain. Hinata missed his friends, his companions. He didn't know how attached he was to them until they all laid dead before his eyes.

He biked down the road, almost falling as he scurried further and further away. His eyesight began to blur as Hinata held back sobs. Why was this world so unfair to him? He was moving so fast that he did not see the hole in the ground, causing his frail body to plunge forward and meet the asphalt.