Captives

TEN

Harper's POV

(Post-escape)

What the hell just happened?

I mean I know what happened, but still, what the hell?! I was abducted, placed in a cellar by the very man that played victim right alongside me for over a month. Who does that?!

"Miss?" The sweet old lady that's driving the bus looks at me with concern. "Getting on?"

I look up at her, hugging myself tighter to combat the cold. She eyes my attire, obviously wondering why I'm dressed in a tank and sweatpants, socks with no shoes. Oh, and there's the gash on my head. What a sight I must be.

"I don't-" I clear my throat, looking left and right.

I half expect Sebastian to jump out and drag me back to the cellar. What's worse is I can't tell if the idea repels or attracts me.

"I don't have any money." I admit.

The old woman looks at me a moment longer, then gestures with her head for me to board anyway. I offer a weak smile, going up the steps and taking the first available seat. It's pretty empty, most people order rides through apps now rather than taking the bus. But I don't have my phone. I don't have anything. I rest my head against the cool glass, wincing when it agitates my cut. Forgot about that.

"Should I call the police, miss?" The bus driver asks, eyeing me in the rearview.

Yes.

"Uh..." I swallow thickly, "No. No, it's fine."

Sebastian could be dead in that cellar. Maybe I should have her call. Besides that, he abducted me and held me captive for almost two months. Why don't I want him to face punishment for his crimes?

Maybe I should have stayed...

No! He kidnapped me. Lied to me.

I've got a cut on my head because of him... Though I know that wasn't on purpose. I've looked into the eyes of true abusers, he isn't one of them. Not one of mine, anyway. Poor Rin faced a wrath from Sebastian I'd never seen. It is possible that the version of him that I got isn't what everyone else experiences. Maybe it's special, just for me. My own personal Sebastian. Not once did he even raise his voice at me. In fact, he treated me better than anyone I've ever known...

I should go back.

My thoughts are driving me crazy and I feel like the space where my soul should reside is hollow.

"What does your soul feel?"

Sebastian's voice whispers through my head, and I'm suddenly back in that cellar as he makes love to me. That's where my soul is. With him. And it's begging me to return to it. To go back to them both.

I shouldn't feel so fondly about the man that stole me away from my life. But was it really much of a life? The same day on repeat, escaping from reality any chance I got. But in there with Sebastian, I felt more real, solid and happy than I have in... ever.

What am I doing? I should go back. I never should have left! Why did I run from him? It was all just so overwhelming. What if he hates me now?

He fell down into the cellar, I could go back there only to find his bleeding corpse.

I squeeze my eyes shut, trying to demolish that imagery. Only for it to be replaced with Sebastian smiling, sitting at our table and watching me walk back down into the cellar to him. Which one would be awaiting my return? Sebastian or his dead body?