EVARA

Aishiki

He kissed me. We kissed. That should have been an end to my thoughts, but it only sent a roller coaster rushing down my heart. The girls didn't have any knowledge as of now about it and I am not sure if I should tell them, so I organized the shuffled thoughts racing in my brain and continued chatting. Ishaan was consumed by then so I could breathe without feeling the need to blurt everything out. I was feeling nauseous, and the breakfast I had earlier was menacing me to make a revisit. Butterflies raced in my stomach and after fucking decades I felt like I was back in high school, my skin tickled with the beginning of something good energy, I felt as if my heart were racing, and I wanted to talk to him about it really, really much. 

I was zoned out all the while they were conversing, I just kept on with my smiles and nods. He stole glances at me, and that shit made me blush. A kiss couldn't affect me that much, could it? I might not know the answer to everything, and I guess I should start normalizing it. 

My surroundings went quite all of a sudden and Sonakshi spoke, " baithe baithe so rahi hai kya??"

"Nah, nahi, nope", I jerked.

"That's so weird of you."

Ishaan interrupted our conversation with a cough, "Will you women allow me to get back to my work now?"

"Yeah you should most probably get going", I got up from the bd.

The girls threw suspicious glances in my direction. Ishaan's look could very possibly be the reason of my death. 

My friends had already befriended him, so they gave him a curt nod of approval before hugging him consecutively with heart-warming smiles.

I walked him to his car where he stopped before getting inside. 

"It was good, really, really good.", his voice husky.

"I..... yeah, same thoughts."

"You sound nervous?"

"I need to process but trust me I won't ever regret this."

"And I will never let you."

"Abb ja kaam kar, you should be busy."

"Not if I get to be with you."

"Shut up, Mr. cheesy lines." I rolled my eyes with a smile, my cheeks were most probably red.

"We barely have a month before you move in with me, when should I take you on a house tour?"

"There's no need to take me" I rolled my eyes. "I knew you were always an idiot and once again, dummy, I know your address, I know you and I will visit whenever I want to."

"Aa jana, whenever." He smirked.

i nudged his chest.

"Ghar ja na beyy, kiska wait kar raha hai?"

"Jaa raha hu beyy, chal bye."

The why he pulled me in with one hand while leaning against the car, other arm still folded over his chest, made my fantasies sine with hope. It was kinky. His white shirt, tousled hair, messy self and tired voice is gonna be the death of me after this. 

He kissed me again, one arm around my waist, holding we as if I was in his favorite sweater. This time it felt even better, I eased into the feel of him and God Forbid, he was going to make me feel everything I promised myself I wouldn't. 

"Chal bye", he said, our lips inches apart but noses toughing.

"I smiled and whispered, "Bye" and gave him a quick peck on his jaw.

Did I see him blush? No I didn't. 

He then drove off and I walked back inside, and I would be lying if I said I didn't think about all the possible ways to kiss him again.

He used to my best friend, he knows me, all my bad girl moments happened with him, all my 'I am just a girl' moments started with him and all my ' I need to yap' moments were first tolerated by him and I don't think my feelings remained platonic for him over the years and today he made me realize.....

I hadn't had a proper boyfriend or a relationship all these years, even though I had some situationships I was never really into and some dates to entertain myself because all these years, no matter how I had forgotten him, I never really got over that blurry idea of his. 

I never really got over him, my best fucking friend.