My Other Half

Revelations

"Are you ever going to explain this?" Cordelia asks quietly as she gestures to the crib in the corner containing my sleeping daughter. I've been coming here for roughly two weeks or so and we haven't talked about it. In fact, we haven't talked much about anything at all. The only questions I've been answering have regarded the academy. After the first day she didn't bother to ask anymore because I always evaded them by changing the subject.

"Audrey and Billie were having a baby" I shrug as I turn back around to continue filling out paperwork. "And they're... you're with them now?" her voice would appear calm to most but I know her better than most people. "Yes" I answer simply, not being focused enough to sugarcoat my response. "So why couldn't you answer my question of whether you were happy or not?" she counters and I sigh deeply, it's clear I won't get out of this easily.

I get up and walk towards her, filling her glass from the pitcher of water on her nightstand. "It's complicated but yes, I'm happy. I know that's not what you want to hear and that's why I didn't answer — also because it's not relevant right now" I state firmly, "you've changed so much" she whispers and I stare at her for a moment before going back over to the desk. I need some distance between us, not because I'm afraid to get sucked back in, it's just not good for either of us mentally.

"Why would you think I wouldn't want you to be happy?" she mumbles sadly, "that's not how I meant it... I meant like — you want me to be happy, obviously, but you'd have preferred that was with you. Can we just drop it?" I sigh heavily and she remains silent. I get through most of the paperwork before Sarah wakes up. I pick her up carefully and sit back down, holding her to my chest with one arm as I whisper soft words to soothe her so I can finish what I started.

She continues to fuss so I abandon the papers and focus solely on her, smiling as I look into her eyes. "Who's the best girl? You are" I whisper before my smile dims a bit. It never really occurred to me how painful this might be for Cordelia. Not having children of her own and me having a baby that's someone else's. "Can I hold her?" I hear her ask softly and it takes me by surprise but then again she's always been the nurturing type.

I seriously debate it for a moment but I have to think of Sarah's other parents. "I would but... she's not just mine and Audrey isn't as forgiving as she appears on screen" I chuckle lightly as I turn my head to look at the blonde. She cracks a smile as her tired eyes close for a moment. I realize I have to tell her what's going on as much as I've been trying to avoid it. "I'll be right back" I tell her and she nods as I leave, finding Mallory and asking her to watch Sarah for a moment.

"Is she going to... you know?" the girl asks before I can reach the stairs — referring to Cordelia and I turn around to reply. "No. I'll make sure of it" I assert and she seems considerably less worried than before, which calms me too. I head back up the stairs and into her bedroom, pulling the chair to the side of the bed so I'm closer to her. "I need to be honest with you" I mumble and I can see the concern in her eyes as she sits up straighter.

"Knock knock, how ya doin?" my entire body tenses as I hear that familiar voice. I haven't seen her in my time here, probably the girls steering her clear of the room. I turn around and face her, I can see the switch in her expression even though she tries not to make it noticeable. "Misty..." the supreme mumbles hesitantly and I take a deep breath. "She's doing fine. Would you give us a minute — several actually, in case you can't read between the lines" I smile sarcastically and she slightly glares at me.

"What's the problem? You aren't even together anymore" she counters and I have to admit it's a valid point. "You know what swampy? You're right. Why don't you take a seat" I smile in a sickly sweet way but it's obvious she doesn't pick up on it as she crawls up on the bed beside Cordelia. "I was just about to tell Cordelia about the good deed you've been hiding from her" I smirk and they both look at me confused but Misty gets it after a second and shakes her head.