Bodyguard | Heesun

3

Sunoo had a terrible night. He tends to have them, so he should be used to them by now, but somehow, he never is. He doubts anyone can ever get used to waking up screaming in the middle of the night because of memories that haunt you even in your dreams.

And the worst part is that he can't even go back to sleep after he wakes up because he knows that it'll happen again and again, a never-ending cycle.

So he works on his music instead.

Most of the time, the lyrics or melodies that he comes up with during the first hours of the day don't make it to his songs. After all, only half of his brain functions properly. But sometimes he gets great quotes or a few lines for a song from those times. He hopes he can get something out today.

Yesterday was hard for him for more reasons than one. He didn't know what the day would bring when he went into the company in the morning. If someone had warned him about the whole new bodyguard situation, maybe he would've reacted differently.

Even if that was the last thing he wanted and his company went behind his back to get him a new one, he still thinks that he deserved to know that they hired someone to spend every waking hour with him. They didn't even care about Sunoo's opinion, and that's what bothers him the most.

He also can't stop thinking about what Heeseung said in the car. Did he research him before he joined the company? And, if not, how did he hear about his past bodyguards?

People like to talk, that much Sunoo knows to be true. And they love to talk about him most of all. Always making the papers whether he does something or not. So, of course, people would hear about this sooner or later. It will make him look like a spoiled brat with a huge bodycount when it comes to security guards, but it's not like he has the energy to deny that.

'Why have so many bodyguards quit in such a short time?' Heeseung had asked and Sunoo couldn't find the words to tell him.

And it's not because he didn't know or because the answer was hard; it wasn't. They left after they got what they wanted. They didn't quit because they never protected Sunoo in the first place.

He's not sure what time it is as he sits on his couch, notebook on his lap and spinning the pen between his fingers, a few lines that barely even rhyme scribbled across the page. His dog sleeps by his feet and the sun seems to be peaking out already.

Looks like it was another sleepless night.

The good thing is that he doesn't really have any appointments for the day according to his schedule, so that means that he can stay home if he wants to.

He could always call Jungwon and meet up with him for a chat, but he's not sure if his best friend will be available. Being the it boy of the country requires lots of time and lots of schedules.

As the sun's light starts filling up every corner of Sunoo's living room, he puts the pen down and closes his notebook and heads back to his bed. His eyes feel heavy with sleep, and he feels as if his whole body were to be sinking down on the mattress as well.

But his memories come back like waves: gentle first until they wash over him like a tsunami, with such force he needs to sit up in bed again and remember how to breathe.

He closes his eyes and tries to focus on the way his chest rises and falls with every breath he takes, tries to focus on how his blood pumps through his veins and how his organs are working properly. He counts to ten with every breath and Heeseung's voice comes back to his head, then saying you need to breathe in and out, slowly.

He hates that he listens to him.

He hates that it works.