Call Me A Liar [Book 1] (Justin Bieber Love Story / Fan Fiction)

41

"I'm thinking about cutting back on Diet Coke," Birdie chirps beside me.

"Hm," I hum, disinterested.

My chin is in my palm, my elbow is on my knees. I'm in a daze as I watch Justin the Thursday after we get home while he trains for his rematch this weekend with Dylan Rhodes. He's been all in since we got back, training at all hours of the day and night until he's completely wiped of any energy.

Other than right now, we haven't seen each other since we got back. Still, we text and talk on the phone when we can.

"I know there aren't any calories, but I heard aspartame can corrode your bones."

"Oh, yeah. I've heard that, too," I lie.

Justin smiled at me when I came in today and he reminded me in secret that we have plans to see each other later, but I still can't help but feel empty since returning home.

I guess something within me thought we'd come back and both immediately see how shitty it is, then we'd run away together and live the way we did for those few short days in Washington. But as one day passes, then another, I worry he's acclimating to the normalcy.

When I start to feel selfish, I remind myself that he's made a commitment to fight Dylan. He's focused. I can't fault him for that.

"My mom said something about it screwing with your pelvic floor."

He looks so serious as he fights Michael for what's got to be the fourth time since I've been here. Michael has asked to tap out twice, and Justin insists on going again.

I love Justin's persistence, but not about this.

Thinking of him in the ring again, fighting someone who for some reason has such a vendetta against him makes my skin crawl. Even after Justin beat him with such ease the first time, I can't help but think that Dylan will use that as motivation to be better. Stronger.

And somehow, it's worse knowing I have to be there and watch like it doesn't scare the absolute shit out of me that this is his life.

"Who am I kidding? I'll never stop drinking this," Birdie slurps down the rest of her drink.

I think I laugh. I can't tell.

I'm distracted.

She sighs, barely noticing my quiet nature. It's more common between us these days because I don't have much to tell her.

I mean, there's plenty I want to tell her but can't.

I could tell her I've met someone who makes me better. I've met someone who makes me want to learn. I've met someone who is utterly consumed by me, who can't seem to get enough of me.

I've met someone who I've fallen in love with. Deeply, permanently, and enough to scar me for as long as my body is on this earth.

Only I can't tell her any of those things.

Something tells me she wouldn't understand, and I don't think my heart could bear it.

Instead, I keep quiet. I let her talk about Josh and Jack and her parents and college. I pay her advice when she needs it, and I'm an ear when she needs it too. But I never give anything back regarding my own life.

Luckily she never seems to notice.

We start down the bleachers together once our brothers head into the locker room. I catch eyes with Justin for a brief moment when he finishes up another practice match, and he's very quickly smiling my way again.

I smile back and remind myself not to look too long. There's no sense in being selfish if I get to see him in just a few hours.

Besides, I don't think I could look longer if I wanted to because I'm immediately being pulled by RJ the second I reach the bottom step.