Inconvenient Things

4. Enter Cole (in a non-sexual way)

"We could use the computer for that." Ashley remarked.

They were all sprawled across Cole's bedroom, trying to figure out how exactly they were going to set Ashley's plan into motion. All except for Nora, who had found a copy of The Sandman under Cole's bed. She hadn't even bothered to sit somewhere comfortable and had joined the book under the bed 2 hours ago. They haven't heard from her since.

"Yeah, because one of us magically knows how to do that." Emery drawled sarcastically. 

Cole cleared his throat. "I magically know how to do that, actually."

Everyone stopped what they were doing and turned to look at him. Ethan narrowed his eyes at him.

"How?"

Cole blushed slightly and scratched the back of his head. "I spent hours learning it because I wanted to make a program that can turn Stardew Valley coins into real money."

That explains it, Emery thought as everyone ohhh-ed simultaneously. Ethan shook his head in disbelief "How are you so fucking stupid and a literal genius at the same time? You really are something else."

The brunet grinned and shrugged lightly. He went to his desk and started clicking away at his computer, Ashley joining him shortly after to tell him what to do. They worked in comfortable silence for a while. Until blasts and screaming were heard from outside.

Ethan shot up and hurried to the window, the rest of the group following immediately. 

"Is that a dead cop?" Cole exclaimed excitedly. He started bouncing up and down like a child who was promised ice cream. Indeed, there was a cop lying on the street, probably dead. There seemed to be a hostage situation. A man was holding a gun to a little boy's head, threatening to shoot him. 6 cops were surrounding them, holding their guns at the ready. 

Harper inhaled sharply and covered her mouth in fear while Ethan started cursing. Ashley, on the other hand, grabbed the bowl of popcorn they had made earlier and started munching on them, observing the scene with interest. Emery angrily snatched the bowl from her hand. 

"Oh for Christ's sake, show some compassion!" Emery hissed while tugging at Cole's arm for him to stop bouncing.

Ashley blinked and monotonously exclaimed "Oh no, this is terrible." before taking back the popcorn and shoving some in her mouth. After a while she added: "You should probably stop Cole though." 

"What?" Emery asked and turned around to where Cole stood. Or had been standing a mere 5 seconds ago. Ethan cursed louder when they heard the front door slam shut and Cole appeared outside. Harper let out a strangled scream. 

"Wait here." Ethan ordered and bolted out of the room. 

Between Harpers quiet sobs and the sound of popcorn crunching in Ashley's mouth, Emery decided to follow. It was stupid and reckless, but Cole was her friend and so was Ethan. They'd practically grown up together. Just as she reached the front door, a hand grabbed her wrist, stopping her. 

"I'm coming too." Ashley whispered. "If I die, I want you to punch Cole in his stupid face then throw yourself off a bridge."

Emery smiled. "Okay."

And with that, she opened the door and they rushed outside. They reached the scene, where Cole was currently asking the confused criminal if he thought that pineapple belong on pizza. Ethan was apologising profusely and tugging at Cole's arm. 

Emery was about to step in when she saw a police man sneaking up behind the criminal while he was distracted by Cole's stupidity. The criminal, a scrawny bald guy, looked to be in his mid thirties. His eyes were wide and sunken in, his cheeks hollowed out. The boy he was holding at gun point was about 11 years old. His light brown hair fell into his eyes, yet not enough to hide the look of terror in those hazel coloured organs of sight. It was now that she saw the woman standing not far away, her body shaking with fear while a man, probably her husband, held her up.

"In the Hunger Games, I think Biden would get killed first. Trump would probably try to team up with George Bush, but they wouldn't get any sponsors. Abraham Lincoln would totally beat Obama if it came down to it." Cole had somehow gone from pineapple on pizza to the president hunger games. 

Emery wasn't complaining, since the criminal was distracted enough not to notice the police man right behind him. He motioned with his hands to the other cops, counting down from three.  When he put down his last finger, he quickly snatched the gun from the criminals hand. Shots were fired at the sky and 5 cops threw themselves at the criminal. Emery watched as one of the cops escorted the boy to his mother. The woman broke down crying in relief and pulled her son to her chest. 

The criminal started shouting and cursing while he was taken to a police car. Emery took Ashley's hand and dragged her to where Cole and Ethan were being scolded by an officer.

„-stupid and reckless behaviour!", the woman was saying. 

Ethan smiled sheepishly „Again, I am so sorry a-„

„Do you think I'd be a good cop? I think I want to be a cop. Is it fun?" Cole interrupted him.

The woman sighed exasperatedly and started walking to one of the cars. Cole huffed grumpily and let Ethan drag him to his house. They were all embraced by a relieved Harper as soon as they had opened the door.  

„This is nice." Cole mumbled into the group hug turning everyone's attention to him. A fatal mistake. Harper let go of them and sent him a death glare. The poor brunet was then slapped by a seething Harper, which made everyone else follow suit. Emery was also about to slap Cole as well when she stopped short.

„Where's Nora?"

Just then, Nora stepped down the stairs, her blonde hair disheveled as if she'd just woken up. She blinked at Harper's tear-stricken face and furrowed her brows. „What's wrong?"

Cole squealed and started jumping ecstatically. „We arrested a criminal!"

Ethan raised his hand halfheartedly, opening his mouth to say something. He closed it again, deciding to let the excited boy cook. 

„That's cool." Nora offered „Hey Cole, can I borrow these books?" She gestured at the stack of at least five books tucked under her arm. 

„Sure!" Cole grinned and continued hopping around, murmuring "I've solved a case. -and yet crime has continued!" under his breath.

„Didn't you hear the commotion?" Harper questioned.

„Nah, I was listening to Metallica. You know, cause „The Sandman" and „Enter Sandman" ?" Nora giggled at that.

Harper glanced around the room. Cole was still bouncing like a rubber ball and Ethan was spraying water at him to „cool him down". Ashley and Emery were fighting. Again. And Nora had disappeared under the staircase, probably with another book. 

„You sure are a weird bunch." she muttered before grabbing a broom to shoo Cole away from the stove.