relish me

↳ 05. this is a deal

I CLOSE MY locker. Wondering if maybe I haven't achieved anything after all.

This day went about the exact same as all my other days. The only difference was Asher looking at me for a short moment this morning, otherwise, nothing too different has happened.

I hold in a sigh.

What is it I even want from all this?

A hand shuts my locker. The sound echoes throughout the hallways. 

When I turn around I see him, Asher. 

With one hand keeping the locker door shut and the other in his pocket. My eyes dart around, noticing the small confused crowd taking in this unusual sight.

"...What are you doing...?" I say in a whisper. His eyes narrow as he looks down at me.

"How do you want this? I was supposed to play your fake boyfriend wasn't I?"

The memory flashes through my brain.

"Ah... Well," I take in the crowd to my right, staring in shock. "Boyfriends walk their girlfriends home," I give him a smile, "don't they?"

He looks at me for a moment before sighing. "I can do that." Before I can even process the happiness I feel from him saying yes he takes me by the hand and pulls me away.

He's gonna walk me home? While holding my hand?

My gaze falls down. I don't want to look at the crowd. I don't want to see their faces. This isn't about them, this is my moment. My moment with him, I don't want to destroy that.

I bite my lip, hiding the glee I'm getting from this.

His skin is warm, so warm it enters my body. His hand has a rough feel to it. 

Which isn't too shocking since these are the hands he uses to beat people up. Yet I don't feel scared by these hands, instead they're comforting. 

I could keep on holding these hands forever.

Before I know it, I'm smiling to myself.

The sun is out, high in the sky. The heat embraces me, my palms turning sweaty. 

I drag my steps while walking with him, wanting to drag this moment with Asher out for as long as I possibly can. Asher doesn't seem to notice. 

His steps match mine, even though he's taller and has longer legs he still manages to walk at my speed.

"We're gonna have to plan out this deal." Asher speaks out suddenly, "I don't want to get into a bigger mess than I already am in right now."

I look at him, thinking over his words. "Like what?"

"We're gonna need rules." He looks down at me casually. "I don't want you falling for me."

My heart cramps.

"Likewise," I mutter, looking away from his entrapping eyes. "I don't need you falling for me either."

Asher lets out a sharp laugh. I feel the sound pulse through my blood. I keep my gaze low. "You're right, it would be a pain if either of us fell for the other."

A low sigh resounds through my ear. "What next?"

I think it over for a bit. 

"You just need to play the role of my boyfriend in school, and maybe sometimes outside of school too. So a good start would be us being next to each other." I swallow my lies, "I need this to be believable."

Asher doesn't seem to have a single care in the world when he says, "Sure."

I swallow down how that makes me feel. "As for you, we'll need to find a way to work with your studies."

"Not my house." Asher cuts in. "We can't study in my house."

I look up at the blue sky, "I can't tutor you in my house either," before turning my eyes to Asher, "We'll have to do it in a library or something like that. That should work."

"Yeah, whatever."

I look at him for a moment before letting go of his hand, slowly, pulling my hand back. "This is far enough, we've already tricked my classmates. 

I can walk the rest of the way on my own." Asher doesn't argue and instead shrugs his shoulders before turning around and walking away. 

But I stay still. 

Watching his figure. Waiting for him to turn around; to turn around and look at me. For just one last glance. But he doesn't.

I turn around, and walk home.

➷➷➷

My face faces the wall. I look at the wall intently. My eyes are open, it's three at night yet not a single cell in my body wants to send me to sleep.

"You're not sleeping, are you?" Makayla says softly.

I don't answer.

"You've been acting strange lately," I hear her turn in her bed, her body now facing mine, "did something happen?"

"Nothing happened."

"You sure?"

"Go to sleep."

Makayla lets out a soft chuckle, "I should be the one saying that." I don't reply.

She hugs her pillow, "If something is going on then you can tell me. Nina and Naira are different, they're older so they can be intimidating. But we..." she lets out a yawn, "we're twins, so that makes us like, soulmates, or something."

I can't help but laugh at that. The laugh is soft and quiet. "Can you ever be serious?"

Makayla goes quiet. She doesn't say anything after that.

Maybe she fell asleep.