The Only Rider

Seperation

"Over here Kane. That's it keep that pose. Perfect!" The camera man said as I stood near an open window that had wind blowing in calmly. It was spring in Bangkok at this time my favorite time of the year. To see the flowers blooming and smell the sweet scents wafting off them could brighten any day for me. I was at my photoshoot for Calvin Klien's new brand of men's underwear. There I stood in nothing but boxers my tattoos on display upon my arms, back and chest. My natural black hair sitting upon my shoulder in a straighten bob type look with a little of it tied into a ponytail. I looked like a boy love actor I saw once I even have been mistaken for him a couple of times. "Alright face me and pose!" The camera man said to me and I turned around to face him. I was in a warehouse in downtown Bangkok in a house setting with fake stairs that lead to nothing and a couch with a kitchenette behind me. I covered my crotch with my left hand as my bulge was very obvious in these boxers I was wearing and posed in a relaxed manner. "Perfect! Keep that look!" The camera man said. My manager Sae gave me two thumbs up as she looked at the monitor connected to the camera. She is my manager but also my very good friend. When she was sick one time I refused to work till she got better because I wasn't going to trust another manager from my company. Besides she's the only manger not originally from Thailand. She may be Thai by heritage but she grew up in Cleveland, Ohio in the United States where I myself am from. I was born and raised in New York City my parents and siblings still live there but since I was 21 I have lived here in Bangkok, Thailand by myself.

The youngest of three children my life was pretty much hand me down's from my older brother Han. The only time I received anything he didn't already have was my 8th birthday when my parents bought me a little rideable motorcycle. My best friend Lee was my first and only passenger upon it. We were inseparable as children. Lee Song was a redheaded mixed Asian boy with a very handsome face his hair was always short due to the pressure his dad put on him to be masculine despite his more feminine yet masculine looking face. He always wore jeans and t-shirts and his hair grew extremely fast. It took me 1 year of not getting haircuts to achieve my current look but him...his hair was my length within 3 months so every 4 months he would get a hair cut to keep his hair short. I could tell he didn't like it but he would never speak his mind. He was too scared of his father to speak against him in any form. I always felt for him in that sense...I was blessed to have the family I do. I remember wondering why he couldn't be just as blessed as me. He definitely deserved it he was always kind to other and showed compassion and empathy for the unfortunate. I never got to ask him why because when we were 13 he came to my house crying. I opened the door to see him there tears forming in his hazel eyes behind him sat his father in their truck towing a u-hual trailer behind it. "Lee!....What's wrong?" I asked. "Im....m....m...moving..." He sobbed. "What! But we have school tomorrow...you can't!" I said shocked. "I don't have a choice Kane....dad got a new job in another state" he said. "A....another state...but! Our project...our dreams....how come!" I asked as I started to tear up. "I'm sorry...." He said. "Lee move your ass! We gotta get going come on son!" His dad called from the truck. At that moment a single tear fell from his eyes and trickled down his face. Then I noticed the bruises he had on his face. "Lee....no....you...you can stay here! Im sure mom won't mind! Mom!" I called. Before she got to us however he hugged me tightly. "I'll miss you! Promise you won't forget me" he said then with the blowing of their horn he ran down the stairs and climbed in the truck. His dad waved lightly and they took off. I ran out my door barefoot and tried chasing the truck down.

However I didn't make it far before I ran into my older brother Han and his girlfriend who stopped me. "Woah there easy Kane where are you off to in such a rush?" He said. "Move! Lee!" I cried as I saw him turn around tears falling from his eyes as they turned the corner and left my sight. Han's girlfriend Kalisa looked too and saw the truck turn then I dropped to my knees as my tears fell from my brown eyes. Han didn't know what to do but Kalisa hugged me and held my head against her shoulder letting me cry. "Its ok Kane its ok let it out" she said. "What's wrong, and where are your shoes!" Mom asked as she reached us. "Not the time Mrs. Jun I think.....I think Lee is moving away"  Kalisa said. Then my mother took over for Kalisa as she held me letting me cry into her blouse. We all went home and I told them everything except that I saw bruises on Lee's handsome face. "Oh honey...I'm so sorry!" Mom said as she hugged me again. "Am I ever gonna see him again?" I asked. "You never know son give it a few days maybe he will call you" my dad said. I waited anxiously by the phone for weeks for Lee to call me but he never did. I fell into depression then it felt as if someone just reached into my chest and tore my heart into two pieces. I tried suicide even a couple of times but I was always saved by either Kalisa or my sister Yuli. I was put into therapy at 14 discharged at 15 and to celebrate my "cure" my family decided to take a trip to my mother's hometown of Bangkok, Thailand. Kalisa came with us then and my older brother took the opportunity to propose to her. I still remember the day. We were walking around in a beautiful park, it was me, Han and Kalisa. He told me of his plan earlier in the day when we were eating dinner and Kalisa had went to the bathroom.  "Isn't she just great Kane...such a beautiful black beauty" he said. "She is indeed" I said. "Hey now don't get any ideas of trying to steal her now" Han joked. "Wouldn't dream of it" I said. "Here hold this for me would you?" He said and handed me a black velvet square box. "No way!" I said as I knew what was inside by just looking at it. "I'm asking her tonight and I want you there. She loves you so much Kane almost as much as she loves me" he said. "I'd love to be" I said. "Im glad you know I love you little bro whether you end up with a guy or girl I'll always be your big brother" he said and hugged me. "I love you too" I said. Then Kalisa returned from the bathroom and I stuffed the ring box in my hoodie's front pocket. "You boys ready?" She asked. "Ready babe" Han said as we stood up. We walked around Bangkok for a little while after that letting our food settle then we reached the park.

It was so beautiful, lushes green trees and blooming Cherry Blossoms. In the middle sat and big fountain that shot up rainbow water from the spouts in the middle of it. It was night time and couples sat on the benches holding hands and kissing. I smiled as I saw a gay couple and a lesbian couple sitting on picnic blankets on the beautifully cut green grass. Kalisa pulled her phone out the breast pocket of her deep blue silky dress to take a picture of the fountain. This is when Han got on his knee and soon people were looking at us. "Kalisa you know I love you right?" Han said as she still had her back to us. "Of course babe I love you too" she said and turned around before covering her mouth with her hands seeing him down on one knee. "Oh my god!" She said. "You are so beautiful I don't know what I did to deserve your love but I'm damn glad I did it" he said and held his hand out to her. Once she took it he held his other hand out to me and I handed him the ring box opened. Kalisa was tearing up at this point as she fanned herself to try and calm down. "Kalisa Ashantis Cox will you make me the happiest man alive and marry me" Han asked. "Oh my god! Yes! Yes of course I will!" She cried and everyone near us cheered. He put the ring on her finger and she pulled him up into a kiss. I wiped the tears that formed in my eyes as they kissed then she pulled me into a hug. "Your my little brother now! Im so happy!" She said. "Kane? Are you ok?"