forgotten

the next day

I wake up to the smell of bacon and the faint sound of lana del rey playing harry had soft spot for lana being she was my idol he fell in love with her to .i slip on one of harrys shirts not bothering to put on panties i go to the kitchen to find harry swaying to the music in nothing but his boxers with a joint in on hand and spatula in the other.i stand in the door way watching him in his own world as i sneek up behind him and snake my arm around his waist and start singing the song in to his ear he turns and give me a slow good morning kiss passing the joint to me i inhale and exhale as i do i can feel my toubles leaving with the smoke from my lungs "what r u making me babe"i say passing to joint back "your fav bacon and eggs"mmmmmmmm sounds good i say licking my lips already feeling light as a feather from the weed i grab a plate as soon as the food is done pushing harry out of the way i take a seat at the breakfast bar with harry siting next to me eating and moaning of how good of a cook he was even tho it was just eggs and bacon but i was so high it tasted like hevan in my mouth.harry takes my plate and puts it in the sink comeing back aroud the bar wraping me into a hug "how did you sleep"good i say as hes kissing me on neck i wrap my legs around him and tell him lets go take a shower it amazed me that harry could carry me he was slinder but all muscle but i loved when he carried me cupping my ass as l clung to him like a bear.he takes me to the bathroom setting me on the tolilet as he turnd the shower i stand and take off his shirt and harry slips off his underware as we both step in me standing in the front wetting my hair and harry take soap in his hand and start lathering my body i turnd my back now facing him as he begains to massage my back and slowly move to my backside i wince at his touch do to last night events harry wispers sorry as he slowly massage my ass i can feel the hot water releasing tenchin in my muscles i turn to look at harry taking soap in my hand i begain to wash him this was my favorite part of our relationship when we would bath togather it was so intament Ofcourse sex was intament but there was someting about us both exposed an taking care of eachother bathing and caressing oneanother it was my favorite place to be with him.we finish and dry off and fall into the bed in our towels its a late sunday afternoon a we stay in bed touching and kissing i have to go back to work tomorrow and harry has to go back to college harrys yonger than me by one year hes a he one year away form getting his masters and i fresh out of college at my new dream jod working for Italian vogue as the head photographer the good thing about my jod i alway got weekends off and so did harry so we spet them togather always.

Its the dreadful monday and im in my usual skinny jeans whit tanktop and flannel around my waist and tan combat boots with camera in my hand takeing pics of a malnourished stick of a so called model as i finish up my session i take off to lunch sitting and waiting on my best friend of ten years and head editor for the magazine we work for"SADIE!"i greet her always with a warm smile as she walks in like a tall glass of water with standing at six feet and a extra inches from her red bottoms as she sride tworads me in her fendi dress clinging to her tight waist and sweetheart hips with her mohagney hair flowing in the wind. she reaches me and i stand and hug her being i havent seen her in three days "lindie I dident think you would make it seems like your alwys calling in "i know i've been busy" trying to pretent like she doesnt no what im referring to.we eat our salads and she ask how im doing with harry being that i told her what happened i tell her everything she know every secret about me being we have been togather sence grad school i told her we kissed and made up but i was still feeling a little distanct .sadie wasent one for relationships altho she has been banging the president of the magazine for quite awhile but she was a dom and he a sub and was really in to the bdsm way more than me the things she has done i dont think i could handle. this one had a tormented mind." i think im going to go away for a while"i say not looking in to her eyes" i have vacation days saved up and i need a breath of fresh air ""i need to think"i dint no why but i feel myself slipping into that darkness that i've struggled with my whole life called depression my meds usually Keep my episodes under control but lately i've been pulling away from harry,my job,myself,and i know harry can feel it thats why i need a break to sort out my feelings."lindie if this is what u need than take a break but is solitary a good thing for you right now"yes i say with a firn note in my voice showing that i no what i need from life and if its leaving the country for a week so be it "well im always a phone call away even if your in Paris"she smiles showing her perfect fake grill that cost more than my car.sadie grew up wealthy and i growing up with a redneck rasisit family that i tried getting away from my whole life we grew up in rural Brazoria texas and when we found out we have both been accepted to nyu we moved to new york after graduation and lived togather untill we got out of college then along came the offers from Italian vogue we ended up both getting hired and the rest is history.we end our lunch and i take the rest of the day and im leaveingin few hours for for london the only way i got to take off in such short notice is if i take one day to shoot one of the girls at fittings for the new seasons.im home and throwing clothes in a suitcase then my phone rings and its him "SHIT"i havent told harry im leaving i answer "hey""hi babe what r u up to "my hands become clamie knowing that i have to tell harry im leaving "wellllll im actually packing""why are you going some where "" yes im going to Europe i wont be gone long just a week"i can feel him go scilent onthe end oh the phone he knows what im doing im running from my feeling i do this at least once a year wher i go off the rocker and lose my mind but some how i find myself and come back to reality i can hear harry drag in a long breath "lindie you dont have to leave to get space just stay here and take a break dont go across the country what if something happens and i cant reach you. dont leave me ""harry i need time to think about where i am in my life ""are you going to leave me" he breath thru the phone "harry i dont no what im going to do the only thing i no is i need to get out of new york."l knew i felt you slipping you cant do this please come back to me ""harry i have to finish packing i leave in three hours" "i dont get to see you before you leave i need to say goodbye .im comeing home"we hang up and within 20 minuts harry is standing in front of me as i shove my shoes in to my suitcase finishing off my packing "harry can you get me my passport from the safe" he walks to the office as i take my suitcase to the living room with th rest of my stuff harry sets it on the bar taking my face In his hands looking me in the eyes 'dont go"as he moves his thumbs across my cheekbones i can feel the tears pricking my eyes as i say i have to do this i feel so numb the tears just kept comeing for the past three days harry pulls me in for a kiss but i feel nothing usually when harry kisses me l light up like a livewire but i feel nothing right now .he pulls away as i look to his eyes and think do i still love this long haired man in front of me