forgotten

the future

Star!STAR! The safe word i had finally said the safe word. I thought i would never have to but i was truly scared. i was bent over the bed standing only in my heels and blindfold behind me was a man that i think i just lost all trust for HIT! An then came another blow i crying "harry please stop" "STAR" i screamd agin. Finally as he came out of his trance he untied me at this point im scared for him to touch me i shudder away from him as the rope comes loose i in a hast take the blindfold tears streming down my face my chest is tight as i realize im having a panic attack i fall to the floor i can feel myself going in and out of consciousness a naked harry is standing over yelling my name telling me to come back to him finally i fade out. I wake up in hot water hearing faint crying behind me i turned around and see harry his hands covering his face sobbing i grab his hand and let him see that im awake. Lindie! "Lindie im sorry i dont no what happened all of a sudden u were on the floor passed out i dont no what happened " "shhhhh"i say still hazzy fom passing out "how long was i out"two minutes all i coukd think was to put you in the tub to get your blood flowing" a still cying harry wrap his arms around my naked body and rock me back a forth we sat there him wispering sorrys and i love u's i can feel myself drawing into my mind as i begain to cry uncontrollably harry hears me and ask whats wrong i undo his arms from me and slide frowed bringing my knees to my chest harry reaches for me i shudder away as the memories clouded back into my head "i was scared harry i said the safe word and u didn't stop"i can still hear the hits from the whip replaying in my mind over and over agin.there always was that fine line of pain and pleasure when harry whipped me but up untill now it was always pleasure i dont no what it was but even tho i ws blindfolded i could feel a shift in harry as he hit me harder and faster we have done this before and it always tuned out great i would beg harry to hit me letting him control me and he would see how wet i would get and we would never finish our whiping session because he would take me right there and we would end the night with mind blowing sex but this time was different it felt like he wanted to hurt me not as if it dident hurt when he whipped me but this time i didn't feel love when he was doing it i felt anger. Me and harry have been fighting the past week and haven't seen each other untill today when he asked me to come over he said he wanted to fix things. Ofcourse i gave in because i can never say no to harry it was one of my weaknesses i came over earlier today and we screamed At eachother and then he grabed me and pushed me against the wall and attack my lips with his moving slowly slipping his toung between my lips grabbing me all over he pulled away and said i love you and i could feel myself starting to pool in my skinny jeans and thats how i ended up at where i am now hurting and scared of the man that sat behind me "i didn't mean to take it that far i got cought up in the moment i didn't realize i was hurting you"i take a deep breath still crying "harry you will never do that to me agin do you understand me NEVER!"i yell at him still trying to catch my breath tears nonstop running down my face he reaches for me "DONT!"i say as i stand up stepping out of the bathtup wrapping a towel around my sore body i walk out of the bathroom leaving harey alone in his own thoughts i lay in the bed i can hear faint crys frm the bathroom i only seen harry cry once and that was
when he first told me he loved me.im in the room alone for about twenty minutes his cries stoped about ten minutes ago he comes in towel wrapped around his waist he goes to the dresser and grabs his uesal black calvin Klein breifs and puts them on walking towards the bed he slide in next to me still in my towel he wraps his arm aeound my stomach and pulls me so that my back is aginst his chest part of me want to tell him not to touch me bit i need his touch right now "lindie i love you i can feel u slipping away from me please come back"i say nothing i just put my hand over his and rub circles with my thumb "harry im tired lets go to bed and we'll talk in the morning" and with that he turned the light off and said one more i love u as i can feel my self slipping into sleep.