I stared at him, never learned his name or anything just looking at him
I shrugged him off me, heading back to my barracks, alone I hoped to be.
I could feel my chest tightening as I shut the door, I sat on to floor by my bed, looking up I swear I could hear Haze. His voice echoed relentlessly, I threaded my fingers in my hair.
"Shut up" I muttered, my voice a forced hiss. Looking up I saw Haze, I swear I saw him, my eyes welled up, stinging my eyes, the salty drops stung and ached to fall but just wouldn't.
I shut my eyes, this endless fight, haze was dead...
....
I sat on my knees scrubbing helplessly at the floor where haze and I had gotten in our first real fight, there was the tiniest bits on blood staining the concrete, I scrubbed and scrubbed but it was never clean enough, never clean enough to forger haze, never clean enough to clear the stain, never clean enough to be good again, and never good enough to be clean.
I threw the scrubbed brush at the wall, my chest heaving and my body stiff, my eyes stayed locked on the cold concrete floor, the stains was about gone but still showed neon in my eyes.
Was I finally losing it?
Was this it?
All it took was a petty little man prying his way a home within my skin, living rent free.
"Pathetic, you've gone soft." I hissed under my breath, My body ached, my arms sore from the scrubbing.
Why couldn't I just live my life? You enlisted silly, your life isn't your own anymore. A voice mocked from my mind.
"Whatever, it's fine" I scoffed walking out of the room. I no longer needed anything to do with haze. I was over him, he was out if my mind, I didn't need to think about him anymore.
What was his favorite color again?
