Falling Into Oblivion

Chapter 1

When I was younger, my dad used to play guitar at night, his voice like sandpaper—rough, but soothing in its own way. Every night, I'd lie in bed and let the sound of his strumming carry me off to sleep. There was something safe about it, like I could count on it to drown out the noise of everything else. Those nights were my anchor, the only time the chaos in my head quieted down.

I miss that. Even now, I crave that kind of calm, that sense of being tethered to something steady. But now, instead of a guitar, it's art that helps me drift.

"Lyra?"

Aiden's voice snaps me out of my thoughts. I blink, disoriented, the memories slipping away. I look up to see him watching me, his eyes squinting in concern.

"Huh?" I mutter, still caught in the haze.

He chuckles, shaking his head. "You good? You've been spacing out for like... ten minutes."

"Shut up." I grin lazily, leaning back against the couch. "I was just... reflecting on the beauty of life." I make a dramatic gesture with my hand, waving it in the air like some enlightened poet.

Aiden rolls his eyes. "Right. Sure you were." He passes me the blunt without missing a beat, a smirk tugging at the corner of his lips. "You like the beat?"

I nod, the low thrum of the music vibrating through the walls of the apartment. Aiden's always making music, always tinkering with some track in the background of whatever else is going on. It's part of the atmosphere here—constant sound, constant motion. "Yeah, I like it," I say, taking a slow drag. The smoke fills my lungs, and I let the tension in my shoulders dissolve with it.

"Good, 'cause you were really zoning out," Aiden teases, but there's a hint of curiosity in his voice, like he wants to know what's going on in my head. But he doesn't press. He never does.

"Now stop talking and let me vibe," I joke, handing the blunt back.

He takes it, smirking. "How's uni going, anyway?"

I grimace. "Ugh, don't bring that up." School. The one thing I'm supposed to be focused on but can't seem to care about. I've got exams coming up, papers I haven't even started. But lately, everything feels like it's floating just out of reach.

Aiden shrugs, taking a hit and blowing the smoke toward the ceiling. "Just checking in. I feel like me and Kai are dragging you down sometimes."

I laugh. "Oh, please. Don't flatter yourself."

He grins, but there's something behind his eyes—something that tells me he's only half-joking. Aiden's always been the sensible one, at least compared to Kai, but that doesn't mean he isn't part of the problem. We all are.

I get up, stretching, and grab the blunt from his hand again. "Alright, I should probably get my life together. Happy now?"

"Ecstatic," Aiden says, laughing as he leans back into the couch.

I take a final drag and toss the blunt back to him before leaning down and kissing him lightly on the forehead. "Bye, idiot."

"Bye," he calls after me as I head down the hallway.

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I close the bathroom door behind me and catch my reflection in the mirror. My hair's a mess, my eyes red from the smoke, but it's not the physical stuff that bothers me. It's the feeling—like I'm constantly trying to hold myself together but don't know how. I lean over the sink and pull out a small bag of crushed Adderall from my pocket.