Are You What I've Always Wanted?

Chapter 15

Waring! Mentions abuse, specifically child abuse.
Feel free to skip this chapter if you are triggered or just don't like reading about this type of stuff.
If you read please read with caution!

Mattheo's POV

Pansy's crying in my arms.

"Why won't she come back?" She sobs

"Where do you think she is?" Blaise asks quietly, but loud enough to be heard over Pansy's crying. "I know you don't know her that well but any idea is an idea." He looks just as sad.

"What if she decided to go home! Or to Hogsmeade and..." Pansy sniffs. "Got kidnapped or worse."

I huff.

Can you see them soon?

No

Why the fuck is she so stubborn?

"... What's her favorite place to go in the castle?" I ask looking at Blaise.

Blaise shrugs. "She likes the library... The library..." He jumps up. "I know where she might be at!"

Pansy looks up. "Well what are we waiting for! Let's go!." She jumps up and follows Blaise out the common room.

I sigh and follow them. Someone's gonna have to calm down Iris if she goes into a fit...

They burst into the library, but wasn't loud enough to draw attention to themselves.

"Ok, you search that side." Pansy points to the right and looks at Blaise, who nods. "I'll search here." She points to the left. "And you'll stay here to make sure she doesn't run out."

"Alright."

They walk off.

It was a boring job waiting to see if a angry sister will throw herself at you. But moments pass and it seems clear that they didn't know her hiding spots.

I know Iris like the back of my hand. Even though she has so many layers to herself (kinda like a onion) and each one of them is just as hard to understand.

When she was young she was sweet helpful and kind she was easy to read, she wore her heart on her sleeve.

Father didn't like that.
He wanted her to be like me. Cunning secretive distant and reserved.

So he did what he always does to people.

Of course by the time Iris was born, he was reduced to practically a parasite, but that didn't stop him.
Nor her age, she was only a baby. Barely a toddler.
He controlled our Mother. Only for a small amount of time, only so she wouldn't die.

Once he was... controlling mother he would abuse Iris.
With anything and everything.

Seeing her small crying form broke me. I couldn't handle it.
So I left.
I wasn't anywhere near the age to live on the run. I was only 4. But I couldn't handle it. Later I came back and lived in the servants quarters. I made sure Iris never knew I was her brother, she just saw me as a servant, a friend, someone to wipe her tears, someone to hold when the nightmares came. Luckily mother was overjoyed to have me back she allowed me to live how I would've lived if I stayed, not like a servant, the only person who I refused to let know was Iris.

I wasn't born to love, that's the problem when your conceived under a love potion, but when (if) the person finds someone they want to protect with their life, you learned to love, to care.

Being slightly older and wiser than Iris (and at the time a better actor), I made sure that Father would never find out that I learned to care. To love. That was a secret I would take to the grave.