A Faltering self

Chapter 21- Drowning in the Past

*Trigger Warning: Abuse & Physical violence*

*Thank you, loves, for all the support. Don't forget to like, subscribe, and comment below anything on your minds. God bless you all! You can find me on here, Facebook, Youtube, Tumblr, Patreon, and I have a GoFundMe to help publish book one of this series. Any help is greatly appreciated whether financial or spreading the word about it or my works. If you know someone who would enjoy Distorted Reality, share it with them. As an Indie author, it's hard to spread the word. Thank you all again. <3

Things are fine. You're okay, just breathe and take it one step at a time.

It's what I've been repeating to myself since shut from everything with Matt. Nothing of note has happened, and it's no coincidence that I keep finding myself far away from Zach. I don't think anything will happen, but that doesn't mean there's comfort when I'm around him even with the others. I'd just rather keep to myself mostly and keep the smile on my face. It's been working, so I've been sticking to it.

Currently, I find myself in Kalston's place as I check on the few casseroles in his oven. Supper shouldn't be more than an hour at this point, so I mostly turn them on low to keep them warm as we wait for the Turkey to finish up. Yeah, I might have started some things too early, but I didn't want to have everyone waiting for the food because I didn't time it well enough. Everything with me is either too early or too late, so today I chose the chance of the prior.

The sliding door opens and I take a glimpse of who it is and notice Kalston walking to me. He smiles and I do too before going back to turning the oven down to 175. I learned when working at GoLow in the deli. But you have to be careful because things can sometimes overcook if left in for too long, but an hour should be fine with everything having larger portions.

Kalston wraps his arms around me and brings the same comfort he did before everything. I close my eyes and lean back into him. Taking the moment to enjoy the simplicity of his presence.

"You know, Love, I could get used to this."

I find myself smiling again.

Me too.

Wanting to make sure I'm assuming his meaning right, I ask with a soft smirk hoping he's thinking the same as me.

"And what is that?"

He turns me around and I see the softness on his face and feeling of home in his smile. A feeling of more resides in the familiarity as the attachment I have growing to him doesn't seem to originate with him.

"You and I, in the same home. I've wondered what it'd be like if we lived together. I know we practically do with us only a wall apart, but I'd love it to just be us, in our own little world. You in my arms every night, and waking up next to you every morning."

His eyes search my face as it seems like he has more words to say, but doesn't let them out.

I'd love that to be the case too, but we can't. Maybe one day, but not yet.

"That does sound nice."

He brushes hair away from my face and the scene shifts for a quick moment that I put off as something else. I close my eyes as I take in his warm touch against mine. I smile, wanting nothing more than to escape into this moment forever. Opening my eyes again, his blue eyes look dark for a moment before they're blue again.

"Then why don't we? I love you, Madison, and there's no one else I can imagine spending my future with."

His words come out so naturally that I almost say them too. That is until I notice someone standing in his hall that vanishes the next second and reminds me why I can't.