"So please don't judge me. And I won't judge you. Cause it can get ugly..."
Don't Judge Me, Chris Brown
It's Wednesday morning and Qua hasn't said 2 words to me since last night at the club. I take it he's mad. My door opens and Qua pokes his head in. "Good. You're awake. We need to talk."
No good morning? "Are you mad at me?"
"No. Disappointed."
"Then I don't want to talk."
"Too bad. Down stairs now." He walks out. He looks and sounds very serious so I decide not to challenge him.
I've been sitting on the couch since 10 this morning and now it 12:30. He still hasn't come into the living room and said anything to me. I feel like Qua put me on a long ass time out. At 2 he finally came in and sat across from me on the other couch. "I hope you had time to think about last night."
"Yes. Dad. I had time to think." I was kind of annoyed because he took 4 hours to speak to me.
"I'm not laughing."
"Sorry."
"What you did was dumb."
"How?"
"I can look at you and tell that you are sore. You don't have bruises but your muscles hurt."
"Not until you mentioned it."
"You shouldn't have gotten into it with her."
"Well you shouldn't have had sex with her."
"Maybe I wouldn't have if you had been there."
"You moved on quicker than I did." Neither one of us said anything for a while. I decided to break the silence. "She's not the only girl you've been with in the past 5 years."
"And I know that your first wasn't your last." We get quiet again. "How many?"
"2. In the past 5 years. You?"
"6, including Venus."
"And you want to talk about me."
"I've known you the longest and yet they-"
"After middle school, you were never there for me. We were at the same high school Freshman year. You didn't pay attention or acknowledge me when you did see me. I graduated Junior year from USC and I seen you all the time all 3 years and you never spoke or responded to me. You have some nerve being mad about my extra "activities"."
"I never saw you in college."
"We had the same classes on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays the first 2 years and Junior year we had the same classes on Tuesdays and Thursdays. I was at every football game, every school event, and every party including the celebrations after your games. You never noticed me because I wasn't one of the girls that barely wore clothes in the winter, or sent pictures of myself around, or in a sex video, or constantly throwing myself at you. But I was at your practices and I was there when you got picked by the Panthers. Your team noticed me. The girls that were all over you definitely noticed me. But you didn't."
I got up from the couch and went back upstairs. When I touched my face it was wet. I laid on my bed and went to sleep.
