Between Desire and Love

Chapter 19: Finding out Answers

Isabella sat on the edge of the couch, her hands clenched tightly in her lap as she faced Robert and Lucas. The tension in the room was palpable, a heavy weight that seemed to press down on them all. Robert took a deep breath, his eyes filled with sorrow. 

"Isabella, your mother's death... it wasn't what you think. She... she took her own life." The words hung in the air, each one a dagger to Isabella's heart. 

She shook her head, refusing to believe it. "No, that's not possible. My mother would never do that. She was always so full of life, so happy."

Robert's face was etched with pain as he continued. "I know it's hard to believe. I didn't want to believe it either. But there was no note, no explanation. She just... she just left us."

Isabella's eyes filled with tears, her mind reeling. "But why? Why would she do that? It doesn't make sense."

"Before she died," Robert said, his voice breaking slightly, "she was acting strangely. She was always worried about you, constantly fretting over something. There was a guilt she carried, something she never shared with anyone, not even me." 

Lucas stepped forward, his expression somber. "I noticed it too, Isabella. She would talk to herself, sometimes forgetting things, important things. It was like she was trapped in her own mind, fighting battles we couldn't see." 

Isabella's mind flashed back to the last conversation she had with her mother. She had felt something was off, a sadness in her mother's voice that she couldn't quite place. 

"The last time I talked to her," Isabella whispered, her voice trembling, "she sounded different. Sad, maybe even scared. But I didn't think much of it. I thought it was just a bad day."

Robert reached out, his hand hovering just above Isabella's, unsure if she would accept his comfort. "She loved you more than anything, Isabella. Whatever was tormenting her, she kept it hidden to protect you. But it consumed her in the end."

Tears streamed down Isabella's face as she struggled to process the revelation. The image of her vibrant, loving mother clashed violently with the idea of her being so tormented that she would take her own life. The guilt of not noticing sooner, of not being able to help, was overwhelming.

"Why didn't she tell me?" Isabella sobbed, her voice breaking. "Why didn't she let me help her?"

Lucas knelt beside her, his eyes filled with empathy. "Sometimes, people hide their pain to protect the ones they love. She thought she was sparing you, but in the end, it just left you with more questions and pain." 

Isabella buried her face in her hands, the weight of the truth crashing down on her. She felt shattered, the pieces of her life falling apart around her. The love and care she had seen in Robert and Lucas's eyes now made sense, but it did little to ease the ache in her heart. 

Robert's voice was soft but firm as he spoke again. "We're here for you, Isabella. We want to help you through this, to be there for you in any way we can."

Isabella looked up, her eyes red and swollen from crying. "I just... I need time," she whispered. "Time to process all of this."

Robert nodded, understanding. "Take all the time you need. We're not going anywhere."

As Isabella retreated to her room, the truth of her mother's death weighing heavily on her, she might find a way to heal. 

The next morning, Isabella found herself standing outside Dr. Janet's office, her heart heavy with the weight of unresolved questions. She took a deep breath, steeling herself for what she hoped would be the final piece of the puzzle surrounding her mother's death. She knocked lightly on the door, and a moment later, Dr. Janet's familiar voice called her in.

"Isabella," Dr. Janet greeted with a warm, if somewhat strained, smile. "It's good to see you. How are you?" 

Isabella took a seat across from the doctor, her eyes searching Janet's face for any sign of deceit. "I've been better," she admitted, her voice steady. "I have some questions about my mother's death."

Dr. Janet's expression shifted slightly, a flicker of unease crossing her features. "Of course, Isabella. I've already told you but I would happy to help you more?"

Taking a deep breath, Isabella leaned forward. "I want to know the truth about how my mother died. I've heard conflicting stories, and I need to know what really happened."

Janet hesitated, her hands fidgeting slightly. "Isabella, your mother died of a heart attack. It was sudden and unexpected."

Isabella's frustration flared, and she couldn't hold back any longer. "That's not true," she said, her voice rising. "I know she committed suicide. Why are you lying to me?"

The room fell into a tense silence. Dr. Janet's face paled, and she looked genuinely confused for a moment before recovering. "Isabella, I understand you're upset, but we only wanted to protect you. The truth can be too much to bear sometimes."

Isabella's eyes narrowed, her anger bubbling to the surface. "Protect me? By lying to me? My mother was acting strange, she was worried and guilty about something, and now you're telling me that you hid the truth from me for my own good?"

Dr. Janet sighed, her demeanor shifting from professional to defensive. "Your mother was under a lot of stress, and yes, she did take her own life. We thought it would be easier for you to accept if you believed it was a natural death."

Isabella felt a pang of anger and betrayal. There was something off about Janet's answers, but she was too exhausted to press further. "I don't know if I believe you," she said finally, her voice quieter but no less intense. "But I need to make peace with it somehow."

Janet nodded, her expression softening. "I understand, Isabella. If you ever need to talk more about this, I'm here for you."

Isabella stood, feeling a mix of frustration and resignation. "Thank you, Dr. Janet," she said, her voice clipped. 

She left the office, the heavy door closing behind her with a soft thud. As she walked out of the hospital, the sun shining brightly overhead, Isabella tried to let go of the anger and confusion swirling inside her. Her mother was gone, and no amount of questioning would bring her back. She had to find a way to move forward, to make peace with the past. With a deep breath, she decided to let the matter rest, trusting that her mother was in a better place now. It wasn't the closure she had hoped for, but it was a step toward healing.