eyes of the mind

chapter 15

Weeks had passed since the conversation between August.

Winter break was filled of slinging shakes, stocking shelves and getting high while watching Christmas movies alone.

Brock went out of town. He had a joint family trip with Augusts family.
He told me that Bianca came along and they seem better than ever.

But something felt off, like Brock was more annoyed with my actions than he had led on.

The more time he spent on vacation with August and Bianca the texts got shorter and the calls got nonexistent.

I was trying not to be over dramatic because it's a familial holiday and maybe he's busy but he always made time.

I would've called Carol but I found out some devastating news.

While I was working my diner job I saw Landon and Carol on a date. A date where I had to serve them and they practically avoided me because of the tension.

It's like I entered this alternate universe where everyone hated me.

But it felt so familiar because the people who were supposed to take care of me abandoned me.

But somehow this felt worse.

—

It's the day before school after winter break.

I'm getting ready for work, and as I look in the mirror I notice the bags carrying my trauma prominent under my eyes.

I barely consumed anything besides weed and alcohol to distract myself.
Which led me to look like I ate a pack of cigarettes for my nutrition.

I put my hair in a ponytail with my diner uniform on along with my converse.

I walk outside to see the sky a pool of grey. So I hopped on my bike and rode it as fast as I could.

As I arrive outside the diner I stop in my tracks. From the window I could see  them.

Brock with some girl, August and Bianca sat next to them, Carol and Landon cuddled all in one booth.

I don't know if it was the weather or the sight in front of me but I just started to break down.

At the same time the sky opened up and my tears were hidden by the rain.

The only comfort I had gotten in weeks.

I then collect myself and went to the over head outside the diner to lock my bike up.

I just walked in not caring about anything.

I saw it was pretty crowded and rowdy. Mainly teenagers enjoying youth before they're confined to classrooms.

"Hey Flower, you're late. We have hella orders racking up so let's get to it. Also you look horrible I hope you're okay" My manager Sally says.

"Gee thanks, also can I just clean instead of take orders today?" I try to persuade her.

"Yeah and you know while I think about that I think I'm going to drop everything and do 10 backflips. NO get to work" she argues while shoving the pen and notepad to me.

She points to my section and to my dismay I have to tend to them while I look like a shell of who I was.

I also noticed a cute guy reading "The Dead's Poets Society", he looked to be older, maybe in college and man was he gorgeous.

Brunette hair that was everywhere with cargo pants, a button up shirt open with a white shirt underneath. His hazel eyes  with glasses sitting on the bridge of his  nose.

I smiled to myself before I walked up to him.

Downside he was infront of them.

"Hi I'm Lavender your server today may I start you off with any drinks?" I say while staring between his book and his eyes.

"Just water, thank you" He says curtly while basically dismissing me.

Not my best moment.

I then go over to the table with my best smile and can do attitude as I came to face my friends, well who I had known them as.

"Hi my name is Lavender and I'll be your server today, may I start you off with some drinks?" I say while staring down at my pad until I heard a deafening silence at the table.

I look up met with faces of guilt, anger, betrayal and pity.

"Didn't know you worked here" I heard Bianca laugh under her breath. Which August just kissed her head and pulled her closer as a response.

"Lavender long time no see, I would love a Dr. Pepper though" Brock says.

The whole table erupted in hushed laughter. I looked at Landon and he looked at me with pity and disappointment.

I held it in and said "For everyone else?"

The laughter died down and they took their order.

As I walked from their table and passed  book guy, he called me over.

"Those guys seemed like jerks, if anything I think they envy you" he says with a smile.

And for some reason I felt appreciated.

Appreciated for waking up today. For taking care of myself, being there for myself.

With no support besides this guy I knew for 10 minutes and who could already see right through me.

—

As my shift goes on, Brian as I learned his name to be, left me a generous tip.

The crew was still there though chatting away. It became background noise for me at this point.

It was until I was cleaning off a table in front of them that I felt something hit me.

I paused in my movements confused on what was going on. After I felt nothing I continued until I felt a rapid fire of what felt like fries hit my body and land on the table I was cleaning.

I turn around only to be met by what tasted like a strawberry shake.

All over my face which dripped down to my clothes.

I wiped my eyes to see Bianca licking her finger and the rest of them roaring in laughter at the sight infront of them.

"GET OUT. YOU LITTLE TWATS GET THE FUCK OUT NOW" I hear Sally scream as she walks over.

"AND WHILE YOU'RE AT IT I BETTER SEE A PRETTY GENEROUS TIP AND THE BILL PAID IN FULL" she screamed in their faces.

They looked annoyed but did what she said.

They filed one by one walking past me with a few bumping into me.

"I know what you did you sick twisted bitch. August told us everything and I mean everything. So watch out" Bianca whispered as she bumped past.

I stand in shock as I look back at them.

Confused. Hurt. Betrayal.

Why would August do this?

Is the question I asked myself while Sally was helping me get cleaned up.

As strawberry milkshake dripped into my shoes.