Shin's Beautiful Addiction : Lyle Hope Bautista

Chapter 6

CHAPTER 6 : CHANGES

"Both of you, how many times do I have to remind you to look after your sister?! Is it really that hard for you to do that?"

Mariin akong napa pikit.

"I'm not against you bringing your friends here, but I hope that while you're having fun, you at least watch over your sister. You know her condition better than anyone, didn't I explain that to you well?"

"Mom, it's not like that, okay? But, alright, we acknowledge our mistake, and I sincerely apologize. I promise, it won't happen again." I can feel Ate Leona's sincerity that it made me feel really bad.

Yakap ko ang hita habang naka upo sa aking kama, si Miss Shin nasa gilid ko at naka harap sa dalawang anak na ngayon ay kanyang sinesermonan.

I felt guilty because I know it's not Ate Leona and Ate Lindsey's fault. "Miss Shin—" I lose my voice when Miss Shin looked at me with a blank face, I swallowed hard. It's the first time I've seen her like this because of what happened to me.

"Stop overreacting, she's not even our sist—"

"Shut up, Lindsey. We already talked about this." Ate Leona cutt her sister off, sandaling natigilan si Ate Lindsey bago umikot ang mata.

Normal na reaction lang 'yon mula kay Ate Lindsey pero talagang hindi ako masanay sanay. I sighed, tama naman siya. I'm not even their sister, why would they take responsibility of me?

My head is starting to twinge again because of the overflowing thoughts, "Miss Shin.." Hindi kona tinangkang salubungin ang mata niya dahil alam ko mawawalan lang ako nang lakas ng loob magpatuloy. "Pasensya na po. It's my fault, I was so careless to think their friends wouldn't go up stairs. Ako nalang po ang pagalitan niyo, wala naman pong kasalanan sina Ate Leona." Humigpit ang yakap ko sa mga hita, ramdam na ramdam ko ang mata nila.

"Lyle, you're wrong. It's our responsibility to watch over you."

Maliit akong napa ngiti, inaasahan ko nang sasabihin ito ni Ate Leona pero hindi ko parin magawang sumang-ayon dahil tulad nga nang sabi ni Ate Lindsey. I'm not their sister.

I knew it, it will not going to be easy. Being their sister means having responsibility, and responsibility means burden. Tapos na ako sa ganung yugto, hindi kona nais maging pabigat pa.

Akala ko magiging masaya ako kapag naramdaman ko nang mayroon akong kapatid mula sa kanila pero naisip ko na pagiging maka-sarili ang isipin ang ganon.

I didn't even consider if it's okay for them to be my sisters, what if they were just being nice to me because that's what their mother had said?

I knew, I'm being selfish again.

I shook my head. "Hindi po, I'm not your responsibility, Ate Leona. I'm not your sister—"

"But we think of you as one." Pagputol nito na sadya kong kinatigil, they think of me as one? "Lyle, don't be too hard on yourself. Sinabi kona hindi ba, maari mo kaming maging mga Ate."

Naibaba ko ang ulo, nakuha ko ang nais niyang sabihin pero paano kaya kung maging pabigat lang ako sa kanila. I can't even handle myself, it's my trauma holding me from the bad side.

"Hope," nag angat ako ng ulo nang maramdaman ang paghaplos ni Miss Shin sa buhok ko. "Just take a rest and stop thinking too much, stress is not good for you." Worried visible on her face, she sighs while guiding me to lay on bed.

"Miss Shin, I'm sorry po." Wika ko ulit nang maka higa, alam kong lubos na naman ang pag-aalala niya.

Hindi na bago 'yon, nung huling magyari ang pag-atake nang trauma ko ay malala pa ang pag-aalala ni Miss Shin. Ilang araw kasi akong naka higa 'non sa hospital bed, hindi lang sermon ang natanggap ko sinalo ko din ang galit nito.