Hey Siri

2.

Two

"Come on, vámonos.

Everybody let's go.

Come on, let's get to it.

I know that we can do it.

What are we doing?

Folding clothes.

What are we doing?

Folding clothes.

What are we doing?"

"Pretending to be happy while I feel like stabbing myself"

Groaning I plopped down on my bed face first. Why do some things have to be so horribly boring? School ended hours ago, and as if differentiation wasn't enough torture, my mom is now making me fold an enormous pile of washed laundry. I tried doing it the 'love your work and you wouldn't have to work a single day' way but even Dora-the-good-for-nothing-explorer-with-a-pedophile-monkey, couldn't make it better.

After minutes of thought, hitting my head on the wall, and a waffle later, I decided to handle it like an adult. I stuck my Little Mermaid underwear on my head, grabbed the nearest piece of clothing, and pretended like I was making sushi. Food is definitely the answer to all my problems. It did speed up the process I swear.

Just as I was about to close my drawer, the door slammed open...and in came Batman. KIDDING. It was Evelyn, she rushed past me and hid under my desk. "Who did you try helping this time?" I asked. You see Eve was my younger sister. She's 9-year-old and has an awful habit of helping everyone. Not that helping is a bad thing; it's just that her techniques are quite... un-natural.

"I was only trying to help," she half said and half whistled. She's missing her front tooth which makes her sound like wheezing.

"You always do, Eve, but how many times have I told you not to. I know you don't mean to mess up, sweetie."

"NO GEORGE, SHE CHOPPED OF MY HAIR! CAN YOU BELIEVE IT? MY HAIR!" I heard my mom yelling outside my door. I looked at Eve and saw her giggling. Well, we definitely have a guilty conscience here ladies and finntlemen. Get it? Finn from adventure time + gentlemen? Anyone? Okay.

My door barged open, "I'm sorry honey-" my mom stopped, "why are you wearing your underwear on your head?" she looked at me as if I was the only one crazy in this family. I got rid of it and hugged Eve who was now hiding behind me.

"Why did you do it?" Mom asked Eve.

"I was trying to help, I promise. You were the one who said your head felt heavy when you came home today."

"Oh God, Charlotte could you please tell her that when I said my head felt heavy, I didn't mean that MY HAIR WAS WEIGHING DOWN ON ME!"

"What do you mean mom?"I asked as I looked at her weird new hairdo.

"I had a stressful day today at work and decided to take a nap; I might have accidentally told her that my head hurt. She thought it was because of my hair. And guess what? I woke up to a scissor snip, her grinning, and my detached hair in her hand!"

"Oh my God hahaha- I mean, ahem, Mom I think it looks okay. Fine. It's great! I mean bob is the new trend, right Dad? DAD, why are you leaving? HEY DAD I'M COMING WITH YA!" I said as my dad rushed out with me hot on his trails.

♔

"First function into the derivative of the second function plus second function into the derivative of the first function," I murmured, "solving both sides f'(x)= 2x. Done." I stretched my back as I put down my pencil, finishing the last of today's homework.