I'm Just A Kid

Chapter 15: Unity Day

The rest of the day passed in a strange blur. Slowly, the effects of the Jobi nuts began to wear off, and camp returned to something resembling normal. The laughter disappeared first, followed by the confused wandering and the belief that everything around them was hilarious. Unfortunately, becoming normal again did not seem particularly enjoyable. Headaches spread through camp almost immediately, and people complained about feeling sick, dizzy and exhausted, their earlier energy replaced by misery and regret. The same people who had been laughing uncontrollably only hours earlier were now wondering why eating random nuts on an alien planet had seemed like a good idea.

I was glad I had not taken any. For once, I had listened to the sensible part of my brain. Apparently, there were rare occasions when my survival instincts actually worked. Finn eventually ordered the remaining Jobi nuts to be gathered and burned, and nobody argued. I watched from a distance as the pile disappeared beneath the flames, relieved that there would not be a repeat of whatever insanity I had witnessed earlier. One day of everyone losing their minds was more than enough for me.

As camp gradually settled, news began to spread about Raven. She had fixed the radio. Well, technically, she had connected it to a screen, meaning we could finally see and hear people on the Ark whenever the connection worked. Suddenly, it became the only thing anyone could talk about. We could call the Ark. We could speak to our parents. Hope immediately rose inside me at the thought. I could speak to my dad. After everything that had happened since we landed, I needed to know he was alright. I needed to see his face and hear his voice, even if it was only for a few minutes.

But, of course, it was not that simple. There was a list. Too many people wanted to speak to their families for everyone to simply take turns whenever they wanted, which was fair enough. Except someone had decided to go through the list in the complete opposite of alphabetical order. My last name beginning with a B had placed me almost entirely at the bottom. Bloody brilliant. Every time someone else's name was called, I felt my patience disappearing a little more. I knew other people were desperate to speak to their families too, but knowing that did not make waiting any easier. I just wanted to speak to my dad.

Eventually, Clarke and Bellamy returned from their mysterious mission. They had found guns. A lot of them. The news spread quickly, and people gathered to see the weapons, but I stayed near the edge of the crowd with an uncomfortable feeling settling in my stomach. There was something deeply unsettling about seeing them. Until now, violence had felt immediate and personal. A fight. A knife. Someone attacking because they were frightened or angry. These were different. They were designed to kill from a distance, and now there were a lot of them sitting in our camp.

Miller had also discovered that the Grounder had escaped. My stomach dropped when I heard the news. For one horrible second, I wondered whether Octavia had been caught somewhere outside camp. Bellamy, however, did not seem concerned. Instead, he told everyone to let the Grounders come. They had guns now. Clarke stepped forward, her expression serious.

"These are weapons, ok, not toys, and we have to be prepared to give them up to the guard when the dropships come, but until then, they're gonna help keep us safe."

I looked towards the weapons again. Keep us safe. That was what everyone kept saying, but I could not stop wondering whether they would actually make us safer or simply give us another reason to fight. Then Bellamy spoke.

"And there are plenty more where these came from. Tomorrow we start training, and if the grounders come, we're gonna be ready to fight."

A heavy silence settled over camp. Tomorrow we would start training. Training to use guns. Training to fight Grounders. I wanted to believe Bellamy. I wanted to believe that being prepared meant we would be safe. But I did not want to fight anyone. I definitely did not want to use a gun.