The Pain Of Regrets

38:Home

"you okay?" Karan asks as he walks towards her and make her sit on the bed "yeah I um....." she couldn't find the words to explain "what happened?" he asks getting concerned "uh panic attacks" she said after a small pause his eyes widen at her "I didn't knew you had panic attacks" he said gently "yeah it was the first time" she said with an awkward chuckle "why?" he asks she looks at him not sure how to start or where to start "the fact that you're going to spend your life with someone you don't love or that you're hurting the person you love?" he asks her eyes widen and she still couldn't say anything "I knew" he said with a small smile "how?" she asks as she comes back to reality "your expressions gives it away" he said and she sigh "I saw it in your eyes the way you look at him the way he looks at you and then me as he wants to kill me" he said the last part with a chuckle "why didn't you said something sooner?" she asks and he shrugs "maybe I was selfish i wanted you all to myself I had this feeling long ago that you have something for jai but I kept quite I was even afraid of asking you what if you said yes? what if you agreed and left? I was just being  stupid and well of course I knew you would say something but when you didn't I began to think maybe you were moving on from whatever it was" he said and sighed "But guess that's not the case" Reem looked at him and she had nothing to say of course it wasn't supposed to go like this she wasn't supposed to hurt him "I'm sorry Karan it was never supposed to happen like this believe me I tried I tried so hard I thought I could move on that's why I said yes to you but" she took a deep breath "but I couldn't" and tells him he just gives her  a small smile and nodded at her she held his hand and smile at him "you are perfect karan you are everything a girl would want and believe me there is someone way more better than me for you you deserve it" he removes his hand from her and stood up "you don't get to say that okay" she stood up too sensing the change of his tone "it's your life so I can't stop you from doing anything reem but you can't tell me what I deserve I know what's best for  me and that was you" something twisted in her stomach and she could feel the pain in his voice "reem this happens all the time it's not something you should feel guilty about I mean of course I would've appreciated if you could told me before but it's alright I understand but this doesn't mean you can tell me you're not worth it because you were all the time I spent with you are the best moments pf my life and they will always be maybe you are right maybe I'll find someone one day but you" he walked towards her and cupped her face "you will always be my firtslove and the first person who gets to taste all my new recipes" she chuckled at the last part even though her eyes were glistening with tears "I'm sorry and I love you" she said and hugged him he smiled and patted her hair "I know I'm pretty lovable" she laghed at that and he smiled at her but the pain still remains on his face "now leave before jai comes finding me because the last time I checked he thought I said something to you that made you leave the party" he said with a grin and she laghed at him "yeah I don't want you dead" she playfully hit his arm and left he room "so it is over" karan said to himself as he looked in the direction she went to and smiled.

there he was talking to their friends his face tensed reem looked at him and sighed he rubbed his hand on his face reem made her way towards them her heart beating too fast tears threatening to come out but she managed to stop them from spilling ".........if he hurt her I'll kill him I'm telling you all I swear it was........." reem heard something he was saying to their friends but he stopped as soon as he spotted reem he looked at her worried she finally reached him and before he could say anything she embraced him in a hug finally a tear escaped she didn't bother wiping it away he was stunned for a sec  but then she felt his warmth she closed her eyes and breath in his familiar scene it felt like she was finally home "reem what happened?" he asks gently when she didn't reply he broke the hug and looked at her confused "what's wrong why are you crying?" he asks again she just looks at him and smiles "did he said something to you reem avneet said you had a panic attack why would you have a panic attack?" he didn't stop with his questions "I'm sorry" reem whispers and he just stops "what  do you mean? why are you saying this?" he asks she just looks down at her hands and another tear escapes "where's your ring?" he asks as he notices his hand "I gave it back to him" she whispers again he just looks confused "I couldn't bare the weight of it it was too much the moment I wore it I felt like I'm drowning and there's no way to get back to the shore I was sinking beneath the weight of it and I didn't knew what to do" she said and looked at him who was still so confused "I don't understand" he simply aid and a smile appears on her face "oh my god for god sake jai just how stupid are you she gave the ring back to him idiot" anu said from the other side and reem chuckled jai still looked confused "yeah but why I mean you were marrying him right?" he asks  "I'm not" she said and his eyes widen a little "why?" he asks "you know jai my whole life I had waited for the day when you will tellme that you fell somergong for me and I waited and waited watched you going out with girls flirting with them and there was not a single moment when I didn't wanted to kill them for even touching you or kill you for letting them I was hurt I cried and i got used to it until you said it that day when you told me how you feel there was a part of that wanted to believe you and guess it did believed you but there was another part that wanted to hurt you make you feel the same pain i felt maybe i wanted to take revange on you i wanted you to feel that there is no future for us just the was y i thought" it was quite no one said anything their friends have went and stood at the bar so they couldn't hear them there was music people chatting but all reem could hear was the sound of her heart beat "and then I saw it when I said yes to karan I saw the same things in your eyes I wanted to see it was there the pain the hurt the fear of loosing it all I wanted yo to suffer but I was killing a part of me to I hurted you and myself and karan along with us" she said the last part with guilt in her voice "but you don't know jai you don't know how many times I have thought what if you wake up one day and realize that no you can't spend your whole life with me that this isn't worth it" she whispers "I would never ever think that reem I love you and believe me if I even get a sliver of chance with you I'm taking it an di'm notletting you go I would be stupid if I do I know I was a jerk and I hurted you intentionally or unintentionally but I did and I'm really really very sorry forthat I swear I would never ever do that again ever' he cupped her face "reem I know this isn't what you expected your life to be but I promised you I wouldn't say a single word if you're happy with your decision so tell me rem are you happy with the decision you  made of marrying him?" he asked looking herstraight in the eyes there was a moment of silence but then she broke it "no" his shoulder relax at that "I'm not the moment I wore his ring I knew I screwed up I messed up things that yes I was being unreasonable because it is true jai I love you" she said nad he closes his eyes just to open them a second later "say that again" he whispers "I love you" she whispers bak a smile appears on his face "of course you do I'm pretty fucking loveable" he replied and she chuckles "and a narcicist" she reminds him and he brings her closer joining their for heads together "that too" he whispers "and I love you too reem I always will" sometimes it's not so simple but after  you say it it feels good like returning home after a long long drive and finally being able to relax that's what she felt and no matter how much people tell you how it feels when this happens you'kl always feel a little spark of your own which no one else can feel it would be a feeling just the two of you can share.

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okay guys this was it for today hope you like it do comment and vote I'll see you later bu bye qt's.

Your Author: Tia