Lighting Up Your Heart

The Aftermath

-(Y/N)'s POV-
Damn it. I thought as I sat up. "Fuck.." I moaned, my head pounding like crazy. "How much did I even drink last night?" I muttered to myself as I sat up, my muscles shaking.
    Suddenly, my stomach churned as my vision began to spin. I clutched my head with my hands, feeling dizzy and nauseous. I tried to take a deep breath, but each inhale felt like a battle against my aching head. I closed my eyes, trying to steady my breathing and steady myself before trying to get up again.
Just then, one of my handmaidens walked into my room and made a beeline for my bed. Her face as serious and as solid as a stone. She handed me a glass of water and told me to finish the whole thing. I chugged the water down and set the cup on my nightstand. Sipping my mouth on the sleeve of my nightwear, I tried to stand up out of bed to get ready. "Ma'am, I suggest that you stay in your bed since I don't want you to get hurt. Also, your mother wished to talk to you later about your whereabouts yesterday." As she continued to talk, I felt my stomach churn and I knew that if I didn't get to a trashcan soon, my bedsheet would be  turned a sickly green color. I pulled the trash can that was by the foot of my bed onto my lap and vomited. And again. And vomited some more. Surely I didn't drink that much last night, right? I'm not that lightweight. I thought as I gagged.
         As I continued vomiting, my handmaiden continued to watch me, seemingly unphased by my current state. After a few more painful moments, the worst of it was finally over, and all that was left was for me to take a few deep breaths and try to calm myself down. My stomach still felt uneasy, but at least the nausea had mostly passed. I turned back to my handmaiden with a weak smile.
      "Thank you for your help," I managed to say. "Please let my mother know that I will be joining her in the living room shortly."
      The handmaiden nodded and left the room, leaving me to gather myself. I felt utterly drained and exhausted, but I knew that I had to push through and face my mother. I slowly pushed myself out of bed, still feeling weak and shaky. With each step, I felt like I was walking on clouds, and it took all of my concentration to keep myself upright. I made my way to the living room, where my mother was already waiting for me.
        "(Y/N), we need to talk," she said angrily as soon as I walked in. "This behavior is unacceptable. You are the a proper lady, and you need to act like it. You can't go out drinking like a commoner or a poor person." Her lips curled with disgust as she uttered those final two words, as if they were the most disgusting thing she had ever tasted.
          I winced at her words, feeling the shame rise up inside of me. She was right, of course - I had gone out drinking, and I had let myself get too carried away. I had always known my mother to be strict and serious, but her words still cut deep.
    "I'm sorry, Mother," I said softly. "I got caught up and lost track of time."
       "This isn't the first time this has happened," she replied. "You need to start taking your responsibilities seriously for once you horrible bitch of a child."
      I nodded, feeling the gravity of her words sink in. I had been lucky so far, but I couldn't afford to take any more chances.
    "I-I understand, Mother," I said, trying to hold back tears. "I'll do better from now on. I promise."
     "Okay, I'll give you another chance," my mother said, her expression softening a little. "But this is your final warning. If you mess up again, I won't be so merciful."
      I nodded, feeling a weight lifted off my shoulders. "Thank you, Mother. I won't let you down."
       "You'd better not," she replied, her tone still stern. "Now get out of my sight. I have some important business to attend to."
       I sighed and stood up, making my way out of the living room. I didn't know what it was about drinking that I found so alluring, even though it always left me feeling horrible afterwards. Maybe it was the feeling of letting loose and forgetting about my responsibilities for a while. But I knew that I couldn't let my weakness get the best of me. I had to be strong and disciplined, like a proper lady.
       I made my way back to my bedroom, feeling like shit. So right then and there I decided to change and go for a little walk around town. I know I did that last night and got wasted out of my mind, but I wouldn't let that happen again.
      So I went to my room, changed into a simple yet beautiful moss green satin dress with long sleeves and tights with matching flats and shawl. (Or a moss green colored vest suit/regular suit with brown dress shoes and jacket if you prefer.)
I stepped out of my room and was greeted by Sydney. "If I were you, I wouldn't go downstairs for a few hours. Your mother is pissed and throwing a tantrum because a maid spilled wine on her dress." "Um, is there another way out of the mansion without having to go through the main living room?" I asked as I twiddled my thumbs. She looked around the hall before she got closer to me and whispered. "Yes, there is, but you'd have to go through the maids' living quarters." "You know what? I can wait a few more hours to go out." I slowly opened my bedroom door and snuck back inside and closed my door. I grabbed a book from the bookshelf near the door and plopped down onto my bed.
        I settled back against my pillows and opened the book, hoping that this novel would be a good distraction from my troubles. I was about twenty pages in when I heard a knock on my door. I set the book aside and called out, "Come in."
        The door creaked open, and in walked my mother. Her arms were crossed, and her brow was furrowed in disapproval, her dress still stained with wine. "Why are you so dressed up? It's not like I'm going to let you leave since you had to be so irresponsible last night and get drunk." I starred at her, not knowing how to respond. "Well, I, uh..." I started, not knowing where I was going with this. I decided to just stay silent. My mother continued to berate me with insults as I silently told myself to hold it together to not make her more angry.
       As my mother's words pierced through my skin, I felt a lump form in my throat. I wanted to scream and cry, but I knew it wouldn't solve anything. Instead, I took a deep breath, trying to calm myself down.
        "I'm sorry, I know I shouldn't have drank so much," I said, my voice muffled by the tears that had formed in my eyes. I looked away, not wanting my mother to see the hurt on my face.
          "Sorry isn't good enough," she said, her voice filled with disappointment. "You're staying in your room tonight, and we'll talk about this more at dinner later today with the rest of the family. I nod, knowing that arguing with her wasn't going to help.
-Later at dinner-
        My heart raced as I seated myself at the table, anticipating the inevitable confrontation with my mother. The servants finished setting out plates of delicious-smelling food, and my mother thanked them as they collected the empty ones.
     "I would like to say something rather important about a certain someone," she stared at me as she said those last two words, causing a few other family members and servants to look towards me. "Someone here thought it would be funny to go missing during the night and was found smoking and drinking in a dirty cemetery."
    My mother turned to look at me. "Do you have anything to say for yourself, (Y/N)?" I stayed silent, not knowing how I would justify my actions. The tension in the air was palpable, and I could feel the heat of embarrassment spreading across my face. "Did a cat get your tongue?" Thomas teased, leaning forward in his chair.
       As I sat there, trying to keep my head down and avoid any eye contact with my mother, Thomas' words stung even more. I knew I deserved the ridicule, but I didn't appreciate the way he was rubbing salt in the wound. My mother, meanwhile, was watching me with a mixture of disappointment and anger, her brow furrowed in a way that told me she was not finished with her punishment just yet.
       "I'm sorry," I finally managed to say, my voice barely above a whisper. "I know I shouldn't have done those things, and it won't happen again. I promise." But despite my words, I could tell that my mother was still not satisfied with my apology.
         "It's not enough," she said, her voice growing louder. "You've embarrassed yourself and the rest of the family. Our reputation is everything, and you've put it at risk with your reckless behavior." Her words cut like knives, and even though they were harsh, I knew that she was right. I had to make it up to her, to the rest of the family, and most importantly, to myself. As the dinner carried on, I barely ate a bite, too distracted by my own thoughts and the guilt of my actions.
          Finally, after what felt like an eternity, dinner came to an end. My mother, still seething with anger, looked straight at me and said, "I want you to think about what you've done, (Y/N). You're grounded for the next week, and you're not leaving this mansion until you prove that you can be a proper lady." I nodded, knowing that it was the least I deserved.
      With that, I excused myself from the table and made my way back to my bedroom. The rest of the night was a blur of tears and guilt, but I knew that this was just some cruel punishment my mom did to make me seem like the bitch and her the victim.

Author's Note
Should I do a chapter in the mom's POV?
(Outfit check)