COMPLETED: Love in the Fast Lane // Max Verstappen

Chapter 19

Max's POV

I arrived at my home in Monaco. Every minute that ticked by made me more anxious to step foot in there. I walked in and said hello. I didn't get a response, but I heard the shuffling of feet. "Kelly?" I called out. I saw her appear in the doorway. She stared at me, her blue eyes piercing. Her black hair cascaded over her bare shoulders. The thin fabric of her dress left little to the imagination. "You're back." Her voice was calm. The complete opposite of last week. "I am." I put my bags on the floor.

I knew what she did to me. I knew what she said to me. I knew how she made me feel. So, why did I walk toward her? Why did I let her touch me? Why did I kiss her?

"I missed you." She said as I brought her to my bed. I didn't say anything back. I placed her down and took off my shirt. She worked on taking off my pants and I slipped her dress off revealing nothing underneath. "Do you always walk around the house naked?" I asked in between planting kisses on her neck. "I-" Her moans cut her off after I began sucking the sensitive part of her neck.

I entered her and stared at the headboard watching it go back and forth. I couldn't bring myself to look at her. "What am I doing?" I asked. She grabbed my face to look at her. "Fucking me." I buried my face in her neck. I still couldn't look at her. I hated myself for this, but the shame I felt only made me cum faster.

"Haven't you missed that?" Kelly asked me after we finished. Both of us were lying next to each other. "No." I said and she rolled over and propped herself up on her forearm. She looked at me in disbelief. "Why would you say that?" She asked. "Because I didn't miss you. I don't miss the way you treated me." I said, still staring at the ceiling. "Max." She sighed. "Max, look at me." I finally turned my head to face her. "I'm sorry." I looked at the ceiling again. "You've said that before." She pulled my face over to look at her again. "I mean it. Things will change this time." I didn't say anything. I just pulled her into my arms and held her. "I love you." She said looking up at me. "I know."

I woke up to a notification on my phone. Kelly was already awake doing something in the living room. I felt sick when I read the text on my phone. I knew what it meant. I had 3 hours- scratch that. I got this text 2 hours ago. I actually had one hour until Y/N would be here and I- I don't know what I just did.

"I have to go." I said to Kelly as I grabbed my keys and left. I didn't wait for her to ask me where I was going and I didn't bother telling her. By the time I got to the train station I stillI didn't know what I was going to say. What could I say? 'Hey Y/N I know I said I liked you but I actually just had sex with my ex, so I'm not sure it's going to work out.' Pretty sure she'd fucking kill me. I mean, I would if I was her.

I sat in the train station waiting. I dreamed about Y/N being here with me in Monaco this whole week and now I would do anything for her to be asleep in her flat blissfully unaware of what I just did. I watched as the last train from Nice rolled in and Y/N stepped off the platform. "Y/N!" I called and she turned around facing me. "Max!" I felt so much pain knowing the smile on her face would be gone soon. I gave her a hug and when we pulled away I felt myself get lost in her eyes. I didn't want to look away because for that moment everything was still perfect.

"So your place or mine?" Y/N said, breaking the silence. "What?" I asked. I hadn't really heard her. "Nothing, I was just making a joke." She said, smiling softly. "Oh, sorry." I stared at my shoes as we walked to my car. "Max I-" "Y/N I-" We both spoke at the same time. "You go first." She told me. I stopped walking and faced her. "I don't know how to tell you this." She tilted her head and smiled. "Tell me what?" She asked. I saw her smile disappear as I couldn't hide the emotions on my face any longer. "I got back together with Kelly." I blinked back the tears in my eyes. She looked away from me and I could see her eyes darting back and forth as she thought. "I wish you told me before I got here." She said and let out a sharp, dry laugh. "Y/N-" I said, reaching out for her, but she pushed my hand away. "I'm just a little confused because-" She paused. "Because after what I saw I don't know why you would ever want to go back to her!" I felt myself getting defensive. "You don't understand Y/N-" "Then enlighten me Max! I just want to understand why you would give me this ticket, if as soon as you got back here you and her were just going to get together again." Tears were rolling down her face. All I wanted to do was wipe them away and hold her in my arms. I couldn't say anything because I didn't know why I was with Kelly again.

"I should be mad, but I just feel sorry for you. How long are you going to let her control your life?" Her words hurt me because I knew she was only telling the truth. " That's not fair." She looked up at me. "No, Max." Her voice was serious and sad. "This isn't fair." She turned around and walked away. I realized this was the end and I knew it couldn't be. "Y/N!" I ran and caught up with her, turning her around. I leaned down. "Don't I at least get a kiss goodbye?" My voice was shaky. She shook her head. "Not this time." She pulled away, but I held her arm. "Max..." Her eyes were closed and she was doing everything in power to not cry. I hated the way my name sounded. I never wanted to hear her say my name like that again, so I placed my lips on hers. I let go of her arm and she placed her left hand on my cheek and her right hand in my hair. I held her hips and pulled her into me. I didn't want to let her go.

We pulled away and I put my forehead to hers. I wiped her tears away with my thumbs. She pulled her head up and looked me in the eyes. "I'm not going to watch you destroy your life Max. But, I can't be the one to pull you out of the gutter. You have to do that yourself." I knew she was right. I nodded my head. "I'll do it. I'll break up with her and we can be together." She shook her head and looked down. "I can't be some rebound Max. I like you too much." She gave me a sad smile. "You need more time. I understand that now. I'll be here for you, but only as your friend until you're ready, and I mean really ready, to be more."

I fumbled with my words as she broke away from me and started down the road. "Y/N-" I tried calling out, but she cut me off. "Goodbye, Max." I watched her walk away. This time it didn't feel like the end, but it hurt just the same.