Screaming in silence

Where it all started

The first love should always be a father's love. He did gave me some kind of love, but not the kind you give to your own kids.
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Ever since i could remember was i always a cheerful little ten year old kid, always smiling to strangers, asking to be picked up by my parents so that i could pretend that i could fly like the littly fairy that i was. Mom and dad were the perfect parents i could ever ask for, they weren't really that strict but I still needed to listen to them or else I would be punished. Sometimes I liked to be punished because afterwards I would get sour candy, I really loved sour candy.

I was playing in the park with a friend of mine, her name was Maya, she really was the best friend I could ever ask for. I met her when we were in 3th grade and ever since we became irresistible from each other. We were talking with each other as we were on the swing until suddenly her phone rang, it was her mother, she said that maya needed to go home because it was already seven pm. My eyes widened when I noticed that it was already so late, I panicked a little because my dad told me that I needed to be home at five. I quickly rushed home but I of course hugged Maya before I left. It took me around five minutes before I finally reached my house but it surprised me because my dad was waiting on me outside, he looked so angry.. those fearful eyes that he had pierced throuh me. i never seen this before.. I wanted to say sorry to him for coming home so late but before I could even open my mouth to let out a sentence he tightly grabbed me by my arm and dragged me inside. He never did this to me before, normally he would talk to me and let me explain myself instead of using force against me. I let out a soft squal out of fear when I felt his right grip on my arm, I wanted to push him away from me but something I did my body was keeping me to resist, to even move.

He threw me on the soft couch before he topped over my little body and moved his face close to mine. I could feel his heavy weight press against me as I make any eye contact with him, until he forced me to. He gripped my chin with his thumb and index finger as he looked at me with those hungry eyes of his before I heard him whisper something into my ear. "I need to punish you, little girl" those words that he whispered echoed through my ears as my body shivered under his touch. There was something different about the way he said the word 'little girl' normally when he said that to me he had such a happy tone to it, but now all I could notice was the lust he had in his body. I didn't knew what to feel because I felt too many things at once, regret, sadness, anger but mostly fear, fear of what was going to happen right now. I tried my hardest open my mouth to yell at him but only a small whimper escaped my mouth. He flipped me around and placed me onto my stomach before he began to take off my clothes. As soon as he did that, something deep inside me awakened. I started to feel a surge of panic and fear. I began to kick my legs recklessly and pushed against him with all my strength, desperately trying to get him off me. I did everything I could think of to make him stop touching me like that, but no matter what I did, nothing seemed to work. he took off all my clothes until i was fully naked.

I thought that he would stop, but he didn't. His hand crawled towards my private parts, and without warning, he pushed two fingers inside of me, causing me to scream out in pain. Confused, I asked him what he was doing, but he just whispered in my ear and forced two fingers into my mouth, making me gag. "Don't fight it, Lynn," he said softly. "It'll feel good."

Those were the longest, most painful thirty minutes of my life. When he finally finished, he left me on the couch, naked and a sobbing mess, with sperm leaking out of me. I lay there, tears streaming down my face, crying so loudly that I sounded like an abandoned doll left to fend for itself. My throat was raw and sore from screaming so intensely, making it impossible for me to speak even though I wanted to. I didn't understood what had happened in those awful moments, but deep down, I knew that my innocence had been taken from me, leaving me forever changed.