Like most music artists, or performers in general, you had a routine before taking the stage. You would always down a massive glass of water, take multiple deep breaths, and then the last ten minutes before the huddle that was always seconds before going on stage, you would sit. You would completely check out and let the nerves flood your body, the adrenaline slowly kicking in as you embraced it. Then you and the band would put your hands in and jump after chanting a few things about kicking ass and playing for all those names or something equally as lame and honestly, lovely, before they all went out, greeting the crowd. Nothing put a smile on your face like hearing the fans send loads of love and energy towards your band moments before they'd do the same and more for you.
And tonight, you felt like you were on fire as the crowd erupted into screams and cheers the second you rose from the middle of the stage.
Johnny was back in California, setting up your next tour merch drop and brand partnership with Louis Vuitton that was set to launch next summer. Your crew, band, and even the employees from the arena all felt lighter and less on edge. It's mostly just excitement and thrill coursing through everyone tonight, the anticipation palpable.
You left Natasha outside your dressing room door, she sent you a quiet 'good luck' when you passed her, and Bucky and Paul were downstage on opposite sides with security guarding the pit and sides of the stage.
"Buenos Aires!" You greeted and the crowd roared as you grinned behind the microphone, lifting your hand to the sky as you revealed your outfit to the audience and those watching at home, "How we feelin' tonight, you gorgeous, gorgeous people!" You laughed when someone yelled they were horny and very, very gay louder than the rest in the front of the crowd or nearby, and then you spun around to throw your arm up towards, "Alright, then! We've got the lovely Selene on drums!" You gestured to each as you introduced, only pausing for a bit to let the crowd cheer for them, your band members doing little waves or tiny bows in response, "Badass Atlas on bass! Your favorite Leo on guitar and finally, we've got the best in the north, south, east, and west – Miss Wanda on vocals and keyboard!" You patted the side of your mic as you clapped along and made little whooping noises for your band and the ones who noticed, laughed a bit, "Now, let's put them to work – this is Welcome To The Academy!"
By the time you took a break during Leo's guitar solo about halfway through the show, you ran off to take a lil tinkle, there was a rip in the shoulder and side of your outfit, so you wrapped the country's flag around yourself in the meantime because nearly your entire bra could be seen through it. What made you smile the most tonight was all the pride flags waving in the crowd and how a lot of the signs said things along the lines of 'we'll love you no matter what' all colored in with rainbow colors. Your thoughts from earlier about abandoning this life completely left your head and you barely registered Natasha following as you made it to the loo.
"Why're you wearing a blanket?" She asked right as you disappeared behind the door.
"It's a flag!" You shouted back, backstage crew talking in your earpiece, and you gathered you had about a minute to get back out there, "My clothes ripped!"
"Can you change?"
"No time!" You came out after finishing up, hearing a 'twenty seconds – get your ass out here, Stark!' in your ear, "Just gonna finish it like this – nobody seems to mind."
"Yeah, probably because you're half naked underneath." She mumbled but you were already being rushed back to stage by the stagehands – term makes sense now.
"Clothes scattered on the floor – she was looking at me as we went back and forth but by the time we was finished, she was halfway out the door!" You picked up the second part of the chorus as you came back, everyone screaming along.
Out in the world, you could deal with the homophobes and haters and their mommies, but when you were surrounded by the love and energy from your real fans, it was different. They created an atmosphere that made you feel safe and invincible. Like you could do anything and there was nobody out there that could stop you guys. That's why you felt comfortable with singing certain, unauthorized songs or switching to the original lyrics now and then.
You ended the set nearly an hour later with your favorite, waving and thanking the crowd for coming. You ran through a group of people to head backstage, taking the longer way, and you collected flowers from the fans who had them ready for you. You grabbed the pen from Bucky's ass pocket of his jeans to sign a few pictures and vinyls and CDs that they had brought with them, but then Paul ushered you to keep moving and soon, you were disappearing behind a massive curtain to duck back into your dressing room.
You left the door open, fully knowing crew and staff would be bustling by but finding it hard to care as you stripped out of your outfit and leaving you sweaty and half naked. You were heading towards the bathroom when you noticed Natasha turning into the room slow enough that you could stop her, but you didn't.
"'Got you spread open like a book with every intention of getting you to crumble with a flick of my tongue and a certain look'?" She quoted your lyrics back to you with amusement and curiosity lacing her words.
She crossed her arms, raking her eyes over your figure – you had never been shy about your body – and then she cocked an eyebrow.
"I've always wanted to be a smooth talking detective and I love a good rhyme." You shrugged and she snorted.
"It's not like that song isn't obvious."
"Who cares?" You chuckled, grabbing your towel, and Rory was knocking on the open door, "Hey, Ror, you're a bit early – or right on time if you want a nude shot."
You reached back to unclip your bra, your fingers stilling behind you as you smirked, watching as Rory comically shielded his eyes and Natasha's jaw clenched, her eyes flicking from your chest to your face like she was trying to focus. Or not move towards you.
"I'll come back!" He squealed, making you laugh, and then ran away, shutting the door behind him – leaving you and Natasha in the room. The noises all muffled behind the door.
"So, your first show," You made casual conversation as you headed towards the bathroom again, actually unclipping your bra and disappearing behind the door, only leaving it cracked open so you guys could keep talking, "How'd you find it?"
There was a long pause, and you could've sworn you heard her mumble something before, "Boring. I don't like being a guard dog for an empty room. I just stood there for over two hours."
"Well, last time I didn't have someone outside while I was on stage, one of the staff were hidden in my closet and jumped out at me, so," You turned on the water, peeking out the door that was shielding your nakedness from the redhead who was frozen in her spot, and it took a moment for her to find your eyes again, seemingly deep in thought, "I appreciate what you do."
"Yeah," She gave you a half smile and you returned it with a lopsided one, "Okay."
