THIRTEEN • Eren Jaeger

CHAPTER 27: Loop Thirteen, II

The finality of it all called you. The boat to Marley moved across the waters peacefully.

You stood by the hull as you did before. This time you were not wiping your tears from someone dumping you, and Eren was not holding you in his arms comforting you. You were dressed in your formal clothes—a blazer and a skirt to blend in with the Marleyans. You had done this so many times before that it had officially lost its novelty.

"[Name], can you help me with this?" Eren emerged from below deck, holding up a tie. "I don't know how."

"I got it," you said, taking it from his outstretched fingers and standing in front of him. You had to lean in to wrap it under his collar and tie it. You were so close to him that you could smell the faint cologne that Onyankopon had lent him. "You dress up well, 'Rennie."

"It makes me feel like a kid when you call me that," he said. "It reminds me of Mom."

"You are a kid, aren't you?" you asked, poking his dimple. "Little 'Ren, not old enough to play with me yet."

His mouth slanted unhappily. "Come on."

You chuckled, finishing the tie, and smoothening it down his chest. You could feel his solid torso even over the coat he was wearing.

"Eren," you said gently. "I haven't seen you as some kind of bratty kid in a long time."

Your voice was serious. Eren looked away, like he couldn't meet your eye.

"Is that a good thing or a bad thing?"

You smiled. It was a smile that made the corners of your eyes crinkle at him, making his heart skip a beat. "Good."

"You think too highly of me," he said.

"You can never do any wrong in my eyes, 'Ren," you whispered. "No matter what happens, I'll always be on your side. You're a good person."

This might be the last time you would ever see Eren this way, before he left for the Marleyan frontlines at Fort Slava.

You would never go back to childhood.

You would never be a kid in Shiganshina with Eren, Mikasa, and Armin ever again.

You reclaimed your old home and went on expeditions with the Survey Corps, but it was not over. Far from it. You had wars to fight and nightmares to be sentenced to. You thought you would have to become a permanent resident of the asylum after what you'd gone through.

And to lose Eren for the last time, knowing that nothing you could do would save him—that was the final blow.

It had been pretty obvious how attracted you were to Eren in this loop. Everyone could see it, and you could tell that Eren suspected that you had feelings for him. But he was waiting on a miracle, waiting for you to refute his doubts. What would happen, you wondered, if you told him?

"Get a room!" you heard Connie yell at both of you from the starboard. "Better yet, rent a room once we land!"

"Connie," you admonished. Despite his rashness, you did not take your hands off of Eren's chest. It was like you were some pair of lovers and you were not shy about it. "How rude!"

At that, Eren chuckled. Your temper calmed down and you sighed, moving your hands from his chest to his shoulders. He did not shy away from your touch; if anything, he welcomed it and relished in the idea that you might feel some kind of way for him. Just as you were.

There was no way you could hide from him now.

"Don't forget your promise," he said.

"Huh?"