Reshimbandh~Silken Threads

17. New Beginnings

Evening.

The room is softly lit, with comfortable chairs, couches and a lounge. Dr. Ankita Singh, a compassionate psychologist in her mid-40s, smiled, welcoming him. "I am Dr. Ankita Singh. Welcome, Arjun."

Arjun eyes the available seats. The one across her table? Too direct. The couch? Over the coffee table, no. He took a few steps towards the couch, the distance seemed fine. His gaze alternated between the two couches. He took the single seater.

"Thank you, Dr. Singh." His eyes darted around the room, avoiding Dr. Singh's gaze. His knuckles are white as he grips the armrest.

Dr. Ankita patiently waits for him to be comfortable. Seeing him take a deep breath to calm himself, she leans forward, giving him a warm smile.

After a few minutes of silence, she asks. "Arjun, what brings you here, today?"

He looked at her nervously. He had tried the mandated therapy before, thrice. Every time he felt that talking to strangers about his personal issues couldn't be done. This time it was different, maybe, he wondered.

"I- um," Arjun gulped. He remembered her words. "I need to work on my anger management issues."

"Okay." Ankita nodded, noting in her diary. Then she observed him again. He was rubbing his fingers, nervously. His eyes looked at her momentarily, then off to reading her certificates on the wall.

He sighed, the silence was making him uncomfortable. "So? How are you going to fix it?" He was standing near her desk.

She looked up and smiled, yet again. A warm smile that reminded Arjun of his aai. "Well, Arjun, this isn't Bob the Builder's workshop, I don't 'fix it'." She air quoted the last words.

'Bob the Builder, can we fix it? Yes we can.' The title song immediately played in Arjun's head. And it wouldn't stop playing. He had watched an episode with his kids yesterday. He sighed, strolling towards the corner table. He counted her medals and trophies. He looked at her, the warm smile, still on her lips, spreading up to her kind, non-judgemental eyes.

His aai also looked at him like that. It has been so long, he wished to put his head in her lap and cry his heart out. Aai. He took another deep breath to put his thoughts away.

He walked back, this time, sitting opposite to her. "So, how are we going to fi-, um, work, on my anger?"

After a few minutes of silence, Ankita said, "Slowly, at your pace."

Arjun sighed. He eyed the shelf. The books seem interesting. He walked up, taking a closer look at the titles. He occasionally glanced at the kind therapist. The silence felt slightly comfortable now. He might give it another shot.

He left wordlessly, as the half-hour that seemed like eternity ended.

~

Later that night,

Rawte Mansion,

Neha knocked the door, "Bhaiya, there's something I have to say.."

"Yes" Arjun patted the couch, she sat beside him.

"Bhaiya," She took a deep breath, "I have been trying, really hard, you know. But I - I can't get those words out of my head. You know I really tried to think of other things, but it's not working. Every time I try to forget it, you come to me with an apology. And I am reminded of it, once again."

"Doll-"

"Let me finish. Bhaiya, honestly, you need to stop apologizing. I understand that you are sorry for whatever you said. But the thing is I just can't forget it. I will, someday, eventually, be able to forgive you, maybe. But I will never forget what all you said."